Hi Ken! All of Ryan Gosling’s iconic film roles ranked from worst to best

I would die for Noah Calhoun

9 months ago

Who knew Ryan Gosling was a comedian? Not me. Until the Barbie press tour and subsequent film attached to it. When he screamed “sublime” while storming back inside the Mojo Dojo Casa in front of Margot Robbie? Oscar worthy. Standing ovation starting. All in all, yes, sublime.

So, in light of Ryan just giving the performance of a life time as (just) Ken, it’s time for a rundown of his most iconic film roles ever, ranked from worst to best. Was this just an excuse to look at pictures of him all afternoon? It could have been. It really may have been.

10. Jared Venett in The Big Short

Mum, I’m scared, come pick me up. This film has some of the most ridiculous hair Hollywood has ever seen. This money trader tale is probably every finance bro you’ve ever mets favourite film but it’s the bottom of the Ryan pyramid for me. Where’s the lover boy. I need him back.

9. Stephen Meyers in The Ideas of March

Sex! Scandal! Politics! Ryans gone full spin doctor in this one. He’s a weasel outwitting presidential candidates but would you go for a drinks with him? Absolutely not. I’d trust this man to get me of trouble but eventually he’d double cross you.

8. Holland March in The Nice Guys

A down on his luck private investigator? I love Holland March. 1970s tash, dad shirts, dad humour. Little bit of himbo energy? Mwah, chefs kiss. Get him to happy hour.

7. Driver in Drive

A bad boy. I could change him x

6. Jacob in Crazy Stupid Love

A converted fuck boy? A smooth operator? A six pack stacked pick up artist with good music taste and unlocked emotional intelligence? Glenn Ficarra and John Requa knew what they were doing with this one.

5. Dean in Blue Valentine

Truly bleak viewing. But Ryan’s character Dean in Blue Valentine will be forever special. You see flashback scenes of how incredible his relationship with Cindy (Michelle Williams) once was, when he was honest and kind – just don’t worry too much about the future.

4. Seb in La La Land

I love how much this gorg little man loves jazz. The dreams! The ambition! The passion! 100% Take him to Soho on a Friday night. He can dance, he can sing. He’s a doll.

3. Noah in The Notebook

One of the most romantic on-screen men of all time. Noah is who you want to grow old and die with. Young with a cute baker boy hat or middle aged with a scraggly beard and a house devoted to you, your relationship would be all passion, lake trips and painting on a Sunday. Sold.

2. Greg Banks in Goosebumps

I really just wanted to put this picture of young Ryan Gosling in here. Look at him! A star from day one. Ryan starred in a Goosebumps episode called Say Cheese and Die, where his character Greg discovers a camera and weird shit starts to go down. Pure melodrama, love.

1. Ken in Barbie

And, obv, at the top of this ranking had to be Ken. A man who wear three gold watches on top of one another, starts a gender revolution because he likes horses, and whose day is only made if the girl he likes looks at him. Honestly, it sounds like he’s in a chaotic hot girl summer era. Need happy hour espresso martinis with him now.