Dave’s Love Is Blind villain era doesn’t mean he’s gay – saying so makes you part of the problem

David Bettenburg has been an unapologetic red flag on season eight of Love Is Blind, but love him or hate him, explaining his poor behaviour away with rumours of him being gay makes you just as messy.

When Dave appeared on our screens at the onset of season eight, he immediately rubbed us the wrong way with statements about women over 30 being unattractive. That concerning trend continued throughout the pods and our disdain only grew once the couples were out in the real world. Funnily enough, he’s even continued the red flag antics a full year later!

But amongst genuine criticisms about his problematic behaviour, some people on Reddit, TikTok, and Twitter have suggested that Dave is knowingly in a lavender marriage – a term used to describe queer people who enter into straight marriages.

I’ve also noticed the same conversations being had about Ben Mezzenga so I’m calling you out!

There has been a lot of talk about Love Is Blind’s Dave being gay

Reddit and Twitter are hardly communities of love and support, but the Love Is Blind subreddit has become particularly grim in recent days as people question whether Dave and other contestants are gay.

As one person wrote on Reddit: “He came onto LIB to find a beard because his enmeshed and conservative family would never allow him to be himself so he needs a wife to keep them convinced that he’s straight.

“But after getting engaged to Lauren, a mixture of feelings of impotence and self-betrayal has him backtracking on his original plan and sabotaging the new serious relationship so that he can go back to square one and try a different way again.”

dave from love is blind u r gay

— leona (@joemamaluvrr) March 3, 2025

Most Read

This video of Lacey from MAFS and her mum at the club has leaked and I don’t know how to feel

The hardest Russell group unis to get into, based on offer rate – and it’s not just Oxbridge

Juicy details leaked about the Love Is Blind season eight reunion and it’s going to be feral

“His [rainbow] shirt says it all. Gurl! Stop torturing her and just come out, we all see it,” another said on TikTok.

Someone else wrote on Twitter: “Dave on Love is Blind is either gay or is in love with his sister. It’s either or.”

Explaining Dave’s poor behaviour with ‘he’s gay’ is never the answer

Gay men can be as toxic and misogynistic as anyone else, in fact, I’d argue that it’s a fairly common issue within the community and something we need to address. Gay men marrying women is also fairly prevalent, with one study saying it’s as many as 20 per cent in America. However, what we don’t do is explain someone’s bad behaviour by calling their sexuality into question.

Questioning the sexuality of celebrities is nothing especially new – Shawn Mendes has been forced to endure such accusations for years – but when it comes to Dave’s sexuality the only piece of so-called “evidence” is the way he treats women and a rainbow shirt. Really?

There are ways to go about critiquing someone without secondary-school-level insults, and if anything, it makes me question your morals more than his. If there’s really nothing wrong with being gay – something which numerous people on Reddit uttered over and over as they launched into their rants about Dave – then why are we using it as a stick to beat someone down?

And think about it, what’s the end goal here? Is Dave supposed to see the rumours and be like “I finally feel comfortable enough to come out?” or are we simply trying to one-up him with statements we THINK will wind him up? Either way, it’s messy and not in the cheeky shady way.

Do better!

For all the latest Netflix news, drops, quizzes and memes like The Holy Church of Netflix on Facebook. 

Featured image credit: Netflix