Bristruths is running for an SU officer role

Bristruths Rory

A serious campaign, for a serious candidate.For years now, our supreme leaders at this university have ignored the needs of its people.We have been… exhausted… We have been confused… We’ve been stuck… We have been betrayed… We’ve been humiliated… We have been abandoned… We have been lost…Until now. All these years Bristruths has been here… Bristruths has been listening and now… Bristruths has a plan!We will implement real, palpable change. We will provide string to help students lost in Queens Building to find their way back out into the world. We will rename Senate House as we were previously promised and lied to. It will be called ‘Senate House’ in Arial Rounded MT Bold. We will invest in new and innovative slide based infrastructure, designed by our very own engineering students, to replace Cantock steps. Provide adequate provisions for scaling St Michael's Hill with a brand new, state-of-the-art, chair lift. We will do away with the unfair viva exam for PhD students, measuring their worth instead by their strength, honour and determination in trial by combat. We will divide woodland road into fast and slow lanes to minimise traffic and dangerous collisions. We will provide therapy sessions for therapy dogs after they visit Bristol Students and increase the budget for treats so their wellbeing is looked after and they can continue to do great work. We will fund research into the mental health and wellbeing of University Students and review the recent mental health survey and wellbeing provisions to make absolutely sure that puppies and ice cream really are the best way to completely cure all mental health once and for all.So… From 9am on the 10th March…Vote for Bristruths to be your union affairs officer.A serious campaign, for a serious candidate.

Posted by Bristruths Rory for Union Affairs on Monday, March 9, 2020