Lincoln graduations to no longer be held in Cathedral as VC doesn’t like going up Steep Hill

Students from Lincoln universities will no longer be able to graduate in the beloved Cathedral as leaked emails show the VC hates walking up Steep Hill.

The change in venues came alight yesterday evening after a leaked email was obtained by The Tab Lincoln from an anonymous university staff member.

The email, sent out from the VC to all university staff members, outlined that graduations will no longer be held in the cities’ renowned cathedral due to the inconvenience of it being located on top of a hill with such a steep incline.

A staff member who replied to the email, said: “Thank goodness for that. The gargoyles make me jump every year and it’s a 10 minute walk to the toilet. Horrible stuff.”

The shocking news was shared this week and has been met with mostly outrage from students and staff at the university. Daniel, a third-year physics student, was very upset as his mum had been talking for months about his graduation. He told The Tab Lincoln: “Graduating at the Cathedral is a big part of our experience and one of the only pros of studying at Lincoln. Well, that and the Christmas market but now we’ve lost that as well.”

April Howitt from the graduation team told The Lincoln Tab she was all for the decision, saying: “No one likes that hill, it’s just a faf. You’re sweaty at the top and someone always loses a shoe and has to hobble across the stage.” April has ushered 86 Lincoln graduations in the Cathedral and is happy that this will be her last.

According to the email, the change has already been implemented and will impact those graduating from University of Lincoln in academic year 23/24.

You might want to check the date, you April Fools x

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