Dumb way to die or smart way to live? Moments that every Lancs student will experience
Spending 10 minutes in in the library’s mile-long toilet queue….
Tiktokers everywhere are bringing back the classic game from everyone’s high school days in the latest “dumb ways to die” trend. The videos show a momentary lapse in judgement, followed by the sound of the classic game theme tune. More recently, a different take on the trend appeared with tiktokers revealing their “smart ways to live”.
Many of these videos are instantly relatable to uni students everywhere, from risky food choices to nights out that we don’t quite remember. We’ve compiled a list of things that every Lancaster student will do at some point, judging if it’s a dumb way to die, or a smart way to live.
Joining the library toilet queue – DUMB WAY TO DIE
Nothing says “I’m done with uni” more than finally stretching your legs after three-hours of tear-jerking attempts at writing your essay, only to be faced by the Lancaster library’s mile-long toilet queue. By the time you get to a cubicle, your assignment will be overdue, and your motivation will have died a slow death.
Getting cash out of the machine on campus before a night out – SMART WAY TO LIVE
Only the truly organised on-campus student manages to remember to do this after pres, and will be thankful they did when they avoid the dreaded Sainsbury’s cashpoint queue before Sugar.
Walking on the wrong side of the spine – DUMB WAY TO DIE
You can’t say you’ve never done this because let’s face it, everyone has more than once. It’s a scarring experience – for everyone involved. The fear of facing a mass of sleep-deprived students walking in one direction towards you with nowhere to escape will be enough to stop you from taking a quick trip to Greggs ever again.
Follow the Lancaster Instagram accounts – SMART WAY TO LIVE
If nothing else, at least let @onlylancs warn you away from County lads.
Getting the 100 bus from Common Garden Street instead of the 1A – DUMB WAY TO DIE
Get ready for an angry horde of Bowerham students who will be forced to stand for the remainder of their trip to campus – you really should have known better.
Buying mould spray – SMART WAY TO LIVE
Even if it sits at the back of your cupboard for months, you’ll be thanking your past self on that random Tuesday when you first notice those little black patches by your window.
Sleeping through your 9am – DUMB WAY TO DIE
It may be dumb, but that won’t stop us.
Group study sessions on C floor of the library – DUMB WAYS TO DIE
You say you’re going to “be productive” and “keep each other accountable” but you’re really taking a trip to Spar after ten minutes and spending an hour gossipping. You’re annoyed at yourself, everyone’s annoyed with you, and it’s basically just a recipe for disaster. You’ll be on the receiving end of more glares than you’ve ever had in your life.
Getting a Greggs when there’s no queue – SMART WAY TO LIVE
Yes, it’s rare. Yes, it may feel like the apocalypse – but really it’s a blessing. The excitement of being able to take your time strolling into Greggs and walking straight up to the counter is better than the food itself. Walking into Alexandra Square and seeing nobody waiting for a sausage roll is like winning the lottery.
Featured images via @craberman and @mizzahoff on TikTok
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