The many, many types of students you will encounter in the library

Have you encountered a talker or a glarer in the library?

Lancaster University is home to many different types of people, which is one of the reasons we love Lancs. That is until you meet the different types of people in the library and wish everyone was a clone of you. Honestly, a trip to the library feels a bit like watching a David Attenborough documentary.

The Talker

We’ve all been there. You’re supposed to be having a study session with your best mate, but that all goes down the pan when you actually sit down in the library to do work. That’s all well and good until you’re trying to study on C Floor and someone is standing right next to you having the loudest catch-up session you’ve ever heard. There really are some things that shouldn’t be spoken about in the library, please.

The Sleeper

When Monster and Costa aren’t enough, sometimes a library nap is just what you need. To be fair to the library sleepers, those booths do look comfy. I hope all the library nappers find the energy they need to power through their essays.

The Fashion Model

Some days, nothing will get you to the library apart from putting on a good ‘fit’. Uni isn’t just about education, it’s a fashion show too. Honestly, we wish we could all be like the fashion model every day.

The Coffee Monster

They will routinely buy a Costa on the hour, or invest in litres of iced coffee from Spar just to keep them fuelled throughout the day. It’s understandable, but the constant stench of coffee is too reminiscent of high school maths teachers.

The one who abandons their stuff for three hours

These people are honestly a different breed. How do they have so much faith in people that you’ll leave their Macbook unattended for three hours? Also, where are they going for such a long period of time that they couldn’t have just taken their stuff with them?

The Procrastinator

They came to the library convinced they were going to smash out an essay and ten different readings but ended up sitting on TikTok, watching Netflix and online shopping for six hours. At least it feels like a productive six hours of procrastination.

The Horny Couple

The infinite number of OnlyLancs posts about horny library couples seem to suggest there’s something in the air that really gets Lancs students going. There’s nothing like the scent of stress, desperation and depression to make you horny right? These are a different breed, but you do you (well— your partner) I guess.

The group who really wish they weren’t in a pod together

Group projects: the bane of every student’s existence. Sometimes you get lucky and your group is wonderful and funny. A lot of the time though, you’re stuck in a pod for the most awkward three hours of your life trying to navigate the horrors of group work. It’s a fate worse than death, honestly.

The loud eater

There is nothing worse than someone eating their packed lunch on C Floor because literally everyone can hear them crunching on their Hula Hoops. I came to the library to study and listen to some banging tunes, not listen to you munch on the contents of your lunch box.

The glarer

Maybe you’re the loud eater or the talker and they’re trying to secretly tell you they hate you.  Maybe you accidentally pushed in front of their friend in the Greggs queue. Maybe they’re in love with you. Who knows, in Lancaster, it could be anything. It’s enough to distract you from your work though.

The one you envy, like, a lot

They’ve got their shit together. They have a productive library session, look amazing and have a healthy lunch with them. You can tell they’ve been to the gym this morning, but not because they smell. God, we’re all so jealous of you.

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