25 things that are easier to do in Exeter than write your dissertation

Deadline season is upon us, and for those of you in your final year, this means lots of late night library trips, multiple mental breakdowns and a LOT of coffee. AKA dissertations are almost due. Now that we’re about a week out from the deadline, now is the perfect time to reflect on 25 things that are easier to do than getting your dissertation done and dusted.

1. Walking up Forum hill

This will never get easier, and I hope that when (if) I graduate, a little bit of me will miss the sweaty, asthmatic incline walk to the library. A very little bit.

2. Finding an affordable house

House prices are soaring and the student loan doesn’t come till next week. Signing onto a house with about 30 pence to your name is not the easiest thing to do, but then again, neither is writing your diss intro.

3. Getting a Wednesday TP ticket

Seriously, why are people still paying £8 for a ticket that costs £2.80? In fact, why are we still getting tickets at all? Ticketed TP stuck around longer than campus COVID tests – who’d have thought?

4. Having a stable wifi connection on campus

Exeter University might have worse phone signal than Dartmoor – I wish that was a joke.

5. Winning something at Batty Bingo

There’s no greater feeling than this, I’m sure.

6. Deciding what drunk takeaway to get after a night out

Why is this a harder decision than what uni to go to?

7. Finding a seat in the law library

It really shouldn’t be hard to find a place to work in a university, but here I am, sitting outside the Digital hub because it’s the closest I could get to the library.

8. Keeping your houseplant alive

I’ve gone through more houseplants than boyfriends – and to be honest, have been far more heartbroken by the plants. Keeping the same one through uni is one of the biggest flexes – you’re officially a responsible adult.

9. Taking a book out of the library

It’s taken me three years and I still can’t do this. Maybe if I had worked out how to do this, I wouldn’t have left all my research til the last minute. Maybe.

10. Cleaning your shared kitchen

Time consuming, daunting, and something you will definitely put off until you have no choice, am I talking about writing your diss or cleaning the oven? I guess you’ll never know.

11. Getting a ticket for EGB

FIXR is more trouble than it’s worth. But to be fair, so is an 8,000 word essay for 30 credits.

12. Actually only going for “one drink” at Henry’s

The only thing harder than going to the pub for one drink is writing one page of your diss. If you can’t prove me wrong, you owe me a drink.

13. Passing your driving test despite the roundabouts

Yes, final year students who still have their provisionals, we see you.

14. Finding a pair of white trousers in a charity shop

As the unofficial uniform of Exeter uni, getting your hands on a pair of these is about the luckiest thing that can happen to a student, except being able to understand referencing – for some of us, it’s just never going to happen.

15. Jumping the club queue with the bouncer right in front of you

Better traffic control than the lights outside Henry’s Bar.

16. Persuading your neighbour’s cat to temporarily move in with you

If you haven’t tried writing your dissertation next to a fluffy animal, I recommend giving it a go. Evidence to follow:

17. Wearing heels the whole way through a society ball

The true test of academic dedication is not an extended essay, but an evening spent wobbling around in heels for the sake of society pictures. The things we do for this university.

18. Logging into your emails without having to double authenticate

It’s me, I swear. No one is hacking into my email to access the 60th JSTOR article today.

19. Cooking yourself (a proper, mum-approved) dinner

This is no small feat. Any time I make a meal that’s anything but pasta I consider myself the new Gordon Ramsey. And if I made enough for tomorrow? God, I’m too good.

20. Getting your second year house deposit back

With your third year house, you might have a chance. You’ve lived, you’ve learned and you’re still grieving the deposit you didn’t get back from last year. Second year house? No chance.

21. Taking the train to Exmouth

Why does it take less time to get to the beach than it does to pick a dissertation title? Asking for a friend.

21. Finishing a Firehouse pizza all by yourself

This is almost unheard of. Almost everyone leaves Firehouse with a greasy tinfoil package, optimistically deemed “meal prep” for tomorrow.

23. Persuading your housemate to drive you for a food shop

Big Tesco may be an adult playground, but it’s no fun and games trying to get there unless you have a sympathetic housemate with a pair of car keys.

24. Attending an 8 am lecture

Why do these even exist? (PSA: Question can be applied to both dissertations and 8 ams).

25. Writing a Tab article

This really should’ve been number one, because this is my number one form of dissertation procrastination. Initially, this list was only 10 things, but then I realised if I stopped writing this article, I’d have to start writing my diss.

And I know this is DEFINITELY easier to do.

Related articles recommended by this writer:

23 things you can’t help but relate to if you’re mid-dissertation at Exeter

44 things its taken me three years of being a uni student to realise

Eight things easier than signing a student house in Exeter