BRISTOL’S BEST BUMS 2017: Entrants are now open
It’s time to get CHEEKy
The most anticipated and illustrious competition in Bristol is back. Bristolians of the world, now is the time to show off your bottoms.
For weeks, students from Stoke Bishop to Stokes Croft have been sitting, quite literally, upon a goldmine of potential. Your posteriors have suffered maltreatment and underemployment, their true callings suppressed under the weight of essay crisis after essay crisis, buttocks subconsciously clenched out of stress.
But(t), there's no need to be bummed out! Fear not! Such wonderful bottoms were not made simply to be sat upon.
Bristol students, it's time for your arses to ARISE. Unclench those cheerful cheeks, grab a pal with a half-decent understanding of photographic composition, and unleash your delectable derrières to the world.
Here at The Tab, we love every type of tush – all shapes and sizes will be celebrated this year. Squatter or not, make no mistake, we want that bum. So, Bristolians of the world, disrobe!
But what, you might ask, qualifies as a “Best Bum”? Here’s what we’re looking for…
High production value
We’re talking dramatic lighting, tasteful composition, and sharp focus. Keep it #profesh in terms of image quality. This is a serious competition – don't do your peach a disservice with a grainy shot!
Think Bear Grylls style grit and determination. This contest is not for the faint-hearted or shy-buttocked.
Be innovative and bold, just like the first paragraphs of your god-awful personal statements. Make the most of Bristol's imposing architecture and dramatic scenery.
Have a laugh
At the end of the day, bums are just bums. We’re not looking for glamour shots, just a lovely, creatively taken photo of your bottom. All bums are beautiful and we at The Tab want to celebrate that.
So, have a crack at it! Send in your peachy submissions to [email protected] by Wednesday 22nd November. Anonymity guaranteed.