Stars Hollow is full of them, so here are the Gilmore Girls characters and their red flags

Red flags are renowned in internet culture and have come in every size, shape and form. The likes of beige flags, icks and turn-offs fall under the same umbrella, but nothing is as serious as a glaring red flag.

And fans of Gilmore Girls will know that there are some major red flags among the cast. From Lorelai to Luke, every character has traits that are big no-nos.

From avoidant attachment styles to snobbery and arrogance, here’s a look at all the red flags of the characters in Gilmore Girls.

Rory Gilmore

Even though she is well-educated, passionate and has a quick sense of humour, Rory isn’t exactly the definition of a green flag.

Her vocabulary is limited to snark and sarcasm, she puts herself on a pedestal, prides herself on infidelity, and frequently disregards her friendships.

Apparently, in Rory Gilmore land, one has the ability to claim a tree as their own and remove anyone else who chooses to sit there? Sounds like a red flag to me.

Throughout the season, she displays a lot more red flag behaviour and actually sucked quite a bit.

Lorelai Gilmore

If anyone is going to have more red flags than Rory, it’s going to be her own mother.

Before sending her to Chilton for an extremely privileged experience of private education, Lorelai must have been giving her daughter lessons in wit and cynicism because she most certainly is an impressive teacher.

Not only is Lorelai the master of sarcasm, but she is extremely flakey and uncommitted. At the beginning of season two, she breaks off an engagement the night of her wedding (we are still crying for Max Medina), she continuously gets back with Rory’s father, Christopher, when he is most unavailable to her and vice versa, and all in all she strings Luke along for the entirety of the series until she finally decides they are right for each other.

Aside from her romantic relationships, her ease in running away from home at 16 with a child should not go unnoticed. Despite her troubles with her parents, the attitude she extends throughout her adult life towards them is honestly childish (aka a red flag).

I guess the apple does not fall far from the tree.

Luke Danes

Have you ever hidden a child from a previous relationship from your current partner? Luke Danes has.

Although a tricky decision to make when an unknown child appears in your life unexpectedly, keeping this information from your girlfriend is not exactly the healthiest decision to make for your relationship. So, unfortunately this constitutes as a red flag for Mr Danes.

Not only this, but he has poor customer service skills, despite being the owner of a restaurant. How he maintained a business by being rude to strangers over a simple cup of coffee is beyond me.

Jess Mariano

Some say he’s Rory’s soulmate, others would say he’s the guy you wouldn’t want your daughter to marry. Either way, he’s full of red flags.

Arrogant, disregarding of people’s feelings, no desire to maintain any healthy relationship, I could go on.

Jess’ behaviour at dinner with Rory’s grandmother was a cringeworthy watch to say the least, especially when your girlfriend values her relationship with her family members as much as Rory does. Emily Gilmore does not deserve to have such painful dinner company.

To be honest, his actions make him more of a bad person than simply a red flag, I wouldn’t argue that leaving the city you live in without telling anyone (especially your girlfriend) is worthy of a jokey internet term, but each to their own.

But … we still have the hots for him (even after recognising all of his flaws).

Lane Kim

Out of all the Gilmore Girls characters and their red flags, I’d argue that Lane’s red flags are far and few, as she’s quite valid in her reasoning most of the time.

She lies a lot, but she also has a difficult relationship with her mother that makes her feel the need to hide her life, so to bash her for it would be harsh.

It’s no fault of her own, but she is Rory’s personal doormat and that’s not exactly a positive thing, is it.

Dean Forester

Aside from being dreamy, Dean is obsessive and clingy.

He followed Rory around school before he even knew her, constantly blew up her phone, was angry that she didn’t say “I love you” back after a few months into their relationship, and not to mention his general temper. No boyfriend should be labelled as “perfect”, as he was, when in fact he was a super possessive 16-year-old boy.

Don’t even get me started on his relationship with Lorelai …

Paris Geller

Dumping your long term boyfriend on his birthday to be in an age gap relationship with your professor isn’t exactly the greenest of flags, but Paris Geller will always stand on business.

She does have a tendency to talk down to people and is a tad condescending, which is definitely something to be wary of when it comes to Paris’ character.

But, to be honest, Paris’ sharp tone and quick remarks aren’t necessarily a threat to anyone else. In fact, her supposed red flags are what balanced out the controversies of everyone else on the show.

Logan Huntzberger

The King of the “Life and Death Brigade”, which is red flag number one. A spare dressing gown in the bathroom for overnight guests, red flag number two (depending on how you look at it). Trust fund baby, red flag number three. Talks patronisingly to and about women, red flag number four. Stole from Rory’s grandparents the first time he went round, red flag number five. Encouraged Rory to steal a boat with him, red flag number six.

Gosh I’m out of breath. And somehow he’s still my favourite of Rory’s boyfriends.

Emily and Richard Gilmore

As easy as it is to adore the two, you can’t ignore the snobbery that exists in their “humble” abode.

They look down on anyone of a lower class that steps foot in their home (think Luke, Jess and Dean), Emily goes through maids like Rory and Lorelai go through cups of coffee, and they use material items and money to maintain their relationship with their daughter.

In terms of their relationship, Richard wasn’t exactly the most loyal husband, in comparison to Emily’s devotion to their marriage; he hides a relationship with Penny Lott and frequently talks poorly about her social events.

I guess no relationship, nor person, is perfect, but the Gilmore Girls cast could definitely do with some fine-tuning.

Gilmore Girls is available on Netflix. For more like this look at the red flags of the Gilmore Girls characters and all the latest Netflix news, drops and memes like The Holy Church of Netflix on Facebook.

Related stories recommended by this writer:

• Breaking up marriages to stealing boats: Here’s every time Rory from Gilmore Girls sucked 

• No ifs, no buts: This is an ultimate ranking of all the Gilmore Girls couples

• If Gilmore Girls characters went to Russell Group unis this is where they’d go

Feature image via Netflix