Here are seven new year resolutions to help you get over an ex at Uni

As someone who has quite literally never gotten over anything in my life, I feel I’m well equipped to share the things I have learnt and am still learning along the way. If your TikTok FYP seems to be intent on haunting you with the “new year, new us” trends, I encourage you to click not interested because otherwise self-destruction is inevitable.

Likewise, the “2024theplot” excuse is officially no longer accepted (or encouraged). Instead, we are entering a new year, one that does not involve ex boyfriends, ex situationships or just exes in general. So, here are some new resolutions to help you with the process.

1. Get new hobbies

Distraction is your new best friend. You’ll be surprised at how much it helps to focus your thoughts on something else. Fill your spare time with a new activity. Join the society you’ve been putting off for months, sign up to the gym and take your frustration out on the running machine (an unexpectedly therapeutic activity).

Do not, I repeat, do not wallow. We are all guilty of this, me more than most, but I promise staying in bed with Olivia Rodrigo’s The Grudge on repeat is only going to make you feel better for so long. Allow yourself a few days of wallowing and then ditch the sad songs altogether because I seriously can’t deal with some of those lyrics.

2. Become an academic weapon

I don’t know what the psychology behind this is but why is it that post break up you suddenly feel like you could write the best essay of your life, spend hours in the library and complete every single task you’ve been set?

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Don’t get me wrong, undoubtedly you will spend the first few weeks (months) crying and eating your feelings but after a while I would seriously recommend channelling these feelings into uni work. When you eventually achieve all the things you want, I’m sure he will regret his life decisions.

3. Don’t attend Wednesday Salvos

There is no escaping the awkward interactions of bumping into an ex, especially on campus. However, there are some things you can do to avoid it and instead choose peace. I promise you it is not fate that you have casually “bumped” into your ex on a Wednesday night out. It is most likely the fact that he goes out every week and is equally drowning his sorrows. Do not actively search for him in the crowded room and avoid the smoking area of Salvos altogether.

4. Self care nights

Nothing beats a face mask, film and your favourite sweet treat. Make use of the pending glow up that will occur post break up and treat yourself to nights like these frequently.

5. Spend time with friends and family

Even if they spend the time laughing at you for the person you’re crying over, time with friends and family is a great way of reminding yourself that you’re not on your own. I often tell people a story about the time my best friend officially decided to intervene in my period of wallowing (thank god). After a solid two hours of listening to me hysterically cry in bed she came down the stairs, drew back my curtains and dragged me to McDonald’s. Suffice to say I was no longer crying after I had seen daylight, eaten some food and ranted about my terrible taste in men.

So go out with friends, force yourself to be in the company of others or even go home for a weekend to rejuvenate.

6. To contact or not to contact

Four double vodka and cokes down and suddenly calling your ex becomes the best idea you’ve ever had. It is not the best idea you’ve ever had and you will in fact wake up the next morning regretting your life decisions. This resolution is easier said than done I know; however, it goes without saying that the no contact rule is an essential step in the process of getting over someone. Remove the temptation that we all know exists and stop torturing yourself!

7. Find someone new?

This might be quite difficult in York… however, it’s not impossible. So go on dates, say yes to social outings and you never know who you’ll meet.

From experience, all of these resolutions are possible even when you think that they’re not. There will be days when you forget he exists and other days where you claim he is the love of your life. Both are perfectly normal reactions (I think).

Although, my most listened to song in 2024’s Spotify wrapped was Taylor Swifts loml so I’m not sure if I’m the right person to judge. Nevertheless, I do know that above all time is a healer (a cliche but very true), you will learn from this experience and you will get over it.