The definitive ranking of the MAFS UK brides and grooms of 2024

So much has happened across the last eight weeks of MAFS UK 2024 that you might be forgiven for thinking that was a typo and we actually endured eight years. Eight years of chaos, fallouts, gobsmacking one liners and the wildest editing I’ve ever seen. It’s the most unlucky in love dating show I’ve ever watched and far and away the season of MAFS UK where I am convinced that no one on the production team wanted any form of happy ending. Now that MAFS UK 2024 is reaching its end tonight, here’s a ranked run down of the entire cast based on how they’ve been across the whole season.

To note: This ranking is arbitrary and not particularly personal to anyone. You’d have to be naive to take this show at face value when the entire cast have called out the edit and imply the show is out to tell a certain reality TV narrative. I can only do this ranking based on what we’ve been presented, and completely accept that what we’ve seen might not be an accurate representation of what these people are like off the show. All love!

22. Alex

Even taking out any allegations that have come up against Alex outside of the show, the sheer grin on his face when he’s arguing with people feels so vindictive and malicious that I cannot rank him anywhere else but last.

21. Holly

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Whatever Holly’s issue is with Hannah, every single interaction they had was null and void because of the way she behaved and the comments she would make. If Hannah ever retaliated, it was all Hannah’s fault. From what we saw, it always felt extremely cliquey with Holly at the head of it. I saw someone on Twitter describe her attitude as “mafia boss” and I can’t unthink it.

20. Eve

Never the right fit for this show. Don’t think her appearance on MAFS UK was good for her or for the rest of the cast. Her decision to not come back for any sort of reunion says a lot.

19. Polly

Polly has had a tough time on MAFS UK no doubt, and has been the source of a lot of vitriol from viewers. Her behaviour with the wine was completely out of order in the episode we saw last night and her fury towards Hannah at the girl’s day was so extreme that there was nothing Hannah could do or say to calm the situation down. I know it’s an edit, but it didn’t look great.

18. Stephen

I get he was upset over Hannah threatening to use that thing he told her in confidence as ammo, but she didn’t and she apologised. She then could do nothing at all to come back from it, and he then also was weird with Sionainn and slimy with Ryan when he confronted it. Bad vibes.

17. Richelle

I did mostly agree with Richelle that Orson came across false on the show, but her behaviour back towards him always crossed a line.

16. Luke

Just when you think you like him he earnestly tries to win Amy back and then tells her PS I want to terrorise your bumhole. Would be mildly amusing and ridiculous if she hadn’t been so clear how much she doesn’t like it. Why would you continue to do something someone has asked you not to do?

15. Adam

We’ve ranked seven people in the MAFS UK 2024 cast and I’m yet to get to one who I think came across well. It says a lot that someone who put their foot in it as much as Adam did this series has beaten out so many. I do think he’s just a bit naff at what he’s trying to say rather than ever being malicious. That being said, had me shaking my head in disbelief at my TV.

14. Caspar

First week or two I thought he was an abomination. The weeks following I softened on him but still kind of have no clue why he spent eight weeks flogging a romantic dead horse.

13. Ross

Really did not appreciate how long it took him to stand up to Alex when Alex was so spiteful to Sacha. A bit of a fencesitter up until that point. Also just someone who comes across as a people pleaser to me rather than fully genuine … But overall, generally seems relatively sweet.

12. Orson

Whilst I do agree with Richelle that I think he just wanted to be on TV, I don’t think Orson was a bad guy and probably deserved to be matched with someone more willing to launch themselves into the process. A very mid moment for the MAFS UK 2024 cast ranked.

11. Charlie

We didn’t really get to see enough of Charlie to have major opinions on her, but it was clear she had a pretty rotten time on MAFS UK. Not that she was fully in the right or anything, but she had a sad ending. I’m glad she’s happy now and found something off the show. You could always count on a decent reaction face for a meme from Charlie in any reunion episode – and I have to respect that.

10. Hannah

Kicking off the ranked MAFS UK 2024 cast top 10 with a highly controversial choice. I do not think Hannah is an angel and I think she had a tendency to come across jarring, but I thought overall the cast’s treatment of her was nasty and I think she arguably had the hardest time on the show out of anyone in the cast. And from a decent TV perspective, her arrival would always somehow manage to cause hell itself to erupt. Deserves some recognition.

9. Lacey

I didn’t always like how Lacey got sucked into the cliquey ways of her pals, but I did think for the most part she came across as one of the sweetest and most genuine people in this cast and I’m super happy for the journey her and Nathan went on.

8. Sacha

A very eccentric character, especially with her home life – but I love that Sacha always stood up for what she felt was right the entire time even if it put her at odds with the cast. Would not have been the same show without her in the mix. Rated her calling out Alex very highly.

7. Kristina

A very sweet girl who I felt so sad for. It’s such a shame seeing things not work out when nobody did anything wrong and there was a lot of care there. Really hope she finds her happiness after all of this.

6. Sionainn

From the moment she came into the show as an intruder I really liked Sionainn. I didn’t particularly love how she handled stuff with Hannah, but I think she came across really genuine and it’s a shame her and Ryan never made it work because I really loved them as a couple. They were probably the two I was most rooting for.

5. Amy

Another intruder who just felt like a breath of fresh air. I really think she handled herself in literally every situation really incredibly and never came across like she was just going with the sway of the group.

4. Ryan

Might be bias because we’re both Manchester boys, but I LOVED Ryan so much. I would have fallen completely in love with him I fear. I’m actually down bad. Seems like such a genuine person with a big heart and I am sad he never found his person in the end. (I’m right here, Ryan).

3. Kieran

We’ve arrived at podium placements for the ranked MAFS UK 2024 cast, and getting the bronze medal is Kieran. I thought I would hate him with the whole tooth gag nonsense from the wedding, but he’s been a great person for the entire series and it’s genuinely such a shame how it ended with Kristina. But despite breaking someone’s heart, he always did it with emotion, care and communication. Just seems like a really lovely guy with his heart in the right place.

2. Emma

Truly the heart and soul of the MAFS UK 2024 cast ranked here, Emma has always handled everything in exemplary fashion. She’s not got what she came on the show for, but she did make an imprint on the cast by always being caring and compassionate and giving wise advice to anyone who needed it. She stood up for any gang behaviour and always was full of positivity. Loved her this season.

1. Nathan

A total dark horse ranked the best out of the MAFS UK 2024 cast. What a guy. I felt like half the cast had absolutely no clue how to take his sense of humour but I got it. Straight away. He never said anything unless he meant it, something I value a lot in people. Never got involved in drama, just floated above it all. A deceivingly smart himbo. I love the way he looks like he fell out of an audition room to be in Busted and landed in 2024. King. Never did anything else this season but make me smile. God love him!

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