Lancs students: Here are nine lies you will hear as freshers and why you shouldn’t listen

Freshers’ Week is one of the most full on and intense times of your university career. You are meeting a lot of new people all at once, you’re expected to go out most nights, and for most people, you’re also living in a completely new city.

It’s completely bonkers, and unlike anything you will ever do in your life again.

Unfortunately, it does also mean that you’ll get advice from people you have only just met. Should you listen to it? Maybe some, but certainly not all.

So, here’s the definitive list of the lies you’ll hear in Freshers’ Week that are absolutely not worth your time.

The Greggs queue gets shorter

It’s never going to get any better than this.

Unless you are committed enough to be there for opening, there will always be a queue across Alexandra Square to reach Greggs.

You will sell your soul to the queue. You will commit half your uni week to the queue.

If you’re an international student, this is what we mean by the Brits love queuing. It will never get smaller.

Your flatmate is fit

This might not be a lie, but it does not mean it’s a good idea. You can admire them from afar, develop a little parasocial crush on them if you’re feeling really self indulgent. But please, for the sake of everyone else in your flat, everyone you know and your own sanity, do not start a flatcest scandal. It might work once in a blue moon, but it’s not worth the heartbreak and drama that the other nine out of 10 times cause.

People in Bowland College have no soul

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We aren’t sure where this one came from, but honestly, it’s a load of rubbish. People in Bowland do have souls! We think.

The ducks are always around, you can take a picture of them tomorrow!

The ducks are mystical free spirits on campus – if you go looking for them, they won’t be around, but they appear when you least expect it, and in the most unusual locations too.

So, if you want a picture, take 30 seconds to get one, as it may be a little while before one pops up again.

Those seats next to the tree in the library? They’re always free, you can nab one any time!

Same deal as the Greggs queue, guys. Unless you’re willing to get there for 6am or you happen to be the luckiest person alive, it’s not happening.

Take a hike up to the Reading Room or wander around the shelves to find a space – there’s often one by the plant wall on A Floor (and it’s pretty there too!).

You can go on holiday in your reading week

You can…but it’s called a reading week for a reason. You’ll probably get set a lot of work for this week, and the last thing that anyone wants is to get off the plane from a blissful four days in Lisbon and immediately remember the stacks of lecture notes that have to go over. Whilst it’s possible, it might not be recommended.

Your flatmates will take the bins out

If you get into the mindset of someone else will take the bins out, they’re never going out.

Make a rota, have a conversation, just take them out yourself – do whatever you’ve got to do, but make sure that they go out, and it’s not three weeks later and you’re lugging bags dripping bin juices down three flights of stairs.

First year ‘doesn’t matter’

It might not matter academically, in that it’s not counted towards our final degree, but before you miss every single 9am, remember that you still do have to pass the year. And it does count in other ways – first year is often the year that people find and form friendship groups and figure out which societies they want to join. Please do consider it as counting in other ways – it is important!

Don’t join too many societies

Join as many as you like! The LUSU Freshers’ Fair is a fantastic resource for learning about all of the taster events that different groups offer, and often they’re free.

As long as you have enough time to balance your studies and a social life with everything you want to do, go bananas! No one is going to stop you!

Related articles recommended by this writer:

• It’s official: The Lancaster Tab is looking for new writers!
• Here are nine things every Lancs fresher should do before uni starts this year
• It’s official: Here are the Freshers’ Week events for each Lancaster college