Here are the 10 official ways to spot a Warwick fresher, and how to avoid looking like one

When you return to Warwick, the sight of freshers roaming around campus can often elicit a strange response. Sometimes it’s bitterness at their youth and naivety about the negatives of university life, or it’s a time for reflection: To remember yourself in their shoes.

Either way, freshers have a specific presence around uni, as individuals and as groups. So, here are the 10 easiest ways to spot them (or avoid looking like one, if you’re a first year who has found their way to this guide).

1. Lanyards

If there is one takeaway from this article, it is please PLEASE do not wear the lanyard. It is truly the number one way to spot a fresher, or declare to the whole university that you’re still young and optimistic. At the average age of 18, I promise you do not need to keep your keys dangling around your neck, especially in the club. Keyrings exist for a reason, people.

2. Lost, and using the MyWarwick Map

Campus is confusing, and navigating it in the first few weeks takes time. This makes spotting a fresher incredibly easy: Just find someone wandering around confused, and fruitlessly trying to use their phone to help.

The campus map on the MyWarwick app, and while extremely helpful for naming buildings, it still leaves many users confused about where to find the strangely sized and numbered rooms. Instead, freshers should just ask the nearest person if they know where it is. If it feels embarrassing, trust me, it’s even more embarrassing when they’ve been here for a year or two, and still can’t tell you.

3. “What accommodation are you in?”

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A classic verbal confirmation that someone is a first year. The first few weeks are the same conversation with different people about your course and your accommodation, so good luck remembering. However, this is still my fallback question when talking to freshers. It’s just such an easy conversation starter.

4. “What’s circling?”

The mythology and fear around circling is one of the most uniquely Warwick experiences. Especially in the weeks before the first few circles, circling’s reputation as intense, scary and borderline bulling is magnified. The older year’s consensus that ‘you just have to experience it, we can’t tell you’ only adds to the fear. Let me put your minds at ease (without breaking the unwritten rules): it’s fun, social and not that scary. Every fresher should go at least once.

5. Carrying Tesco bags through central campus

This is not a criticism. We can all remember the treacherous walk from Tesco’s with frozen chips defrosting in your bag and the bottles of alcohol clinking together to let everyone know what you’ve bought. If you’re carrying them across the piazza, 9/10 times you’re a fresher. A special recognition to those making the trek from Sherbourne; you are the true heroes.

6. Comically large backpacks

For some reason the average fresher reverts back to the classic backpack rocked by year sevens up and down the country. I don’t know why you need them strapped up to the top of your back, or why they are so full. Surely you just need a laptop and water bottle?

7. A weekly shop in co-op

If you’re carrying a basket around the new co-op (or former Rootes), just know everyone can tell that you’re a first year. No one else at the university can justify those prices.

8. Queuing outside Senate House after losing keys or ID cards

I’m always filled with a little bit of smugness when I see the long snaking queues around Senate House. It’s a cannon fresher event to loose your keycard, especially if you’re locked out of your room after cooking or showering. Everyone has been there; I personally remember making the walk in my slippers in the rain. Not fun.

9. Unable to open the doors in the FAB

In the freshers’ defence, they do take a little while to figure out. The awkward hoovering outside, and trying every possible combination is a big neon sign declaring you’re a first year.

10. Buying plants in the plant sale

The optimistic confidence that you can keep a plant alive in a university room, and remember to water it when you barely know how to take care of yourself, is a uniquely fresher mentality. There’s a reason the plant sale is so popular, but only there for the first week.