Eight ways to let everyone know that you did a year abroad at Bristol Uni

With the current freezing weather and miserable all-nighters in the ASS, it is hard to not reminisce on life in the European sun. With many fourth years returning from their year abroad, we are reminded that Bristol is not some peoples only personality trait – we have another university and city to bang on about too! Now the question is: who is more insufferable? Gap year students who learnt to surf in Bali or year abroad students who now are fluent Spanish?

If your gap year was a movie and if talking about it reminds you of a better and definitely less stressful time, then here are some tips on how to let others know about it too! Because trust me, they are desperate to know EVERYTHING.

1. Use the key phrase ‘Well when I was on my year abroad…’

I would recommend starting roughly every second sentence with this delightful little phrase. Clutch at straws, vaguely connect any story a friend tells you with a similar one that happened to you when you were abroad, make sure to pop in some anecdotes about your edgy European friends.

It can be used in a wide variety of situations and is very useful in the art of complaining about UK culture. Examples include moaning about the start time of pres because when you were in Spain you didn’t go out until long after midnight and that you just can’t believe that your housemates are eating so early because in Europe lunch was at 4pm.

2. Use ‘correct’ pronunciation

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Despite the fact it makes no linguistical sense to do this, it is perhaps one of the most effective ways to make it obvious you did a year abroad, without explicitly saying it. “Barcelona? I’m sorry, I’ve never heard of it. Oh, pardon me, but do you mean ‘Barthelona’?” Oh yes, I just adore croissants (insert ridiculous French accent here).

This is an important method to use if you wish to be the superior of your fellow students, who have only been to the city for a long weekend. Remember, they just don’t GET it like you do.

3. Have a niche accent

This applies to language students who are returning from a year abroad. For example, adopt an unintelligible Quebec accent despite the fact you spent a mere three months there in TB1. No, it doesn’t make any sense at all. It’s like a Scot returning home for Christmas having picked up a thick Bristolian accent.

But no matter, be sure to strut into your seminars with a heavily put-on accent so that no one has to guess where you were. If you wish to take it a step further, put on a loosely Argentine/Mexican/Spanish accent as you travelled so much that you just have a mix of accents at the moment. The rest of your Spanish cohort will worship you like a god. Bonus points for using Latin-American slang your Spanish lecturers have never heard.

4. Rep that merch

Are you in possession of an “I Heart Melbourne” t-shirt? Spanish flag socks? Water bottle from your university in Singapore? Well of course you are! So, put on that year abroad merchandise and parade up and down Woodland Road in it so that everybody knows you’re incredibly cultured and educated. If a tree falls and no one is around to hear it, does it really make a sound? If you were in Canada and you aren’t wearing your Canada t-shirt on campus, did you ever really go?

This is not limited to items of clothing. Put that Spanish flag up in your living room! Make that postcard wall of all the cities you visited because train travel in Europe was “so cheap”! No one should cross your path without immediately being able to deduce that you did a year abroad.

5. Put your phone in the language of the country you were in

Do it just because you can. Leave your phone on the table, angled strategically towards your friends so that when you get a notification everyone can see that it says “vendredi” instead of Friday.

6. Exclusively listen to foreign music

Beg to get put on aux at pres and then blast your newly discovered underground Spanish artist, Rosalía. Accost the poor DJ in La Rocca and make him play Bad Bunny, leaving the crowd in awe of your Spanish rap abilities.

7. Smoke and drink as normal but do it in a ‘European’ way

Maintain the same poor smoking and drinking habits as you picked up in Freshers’ Week, but make excuses for yourself, because this is just how it’s done in Europe. What’s the point of returning from France if you don’t have an inordinate amount of contraband “Vogues” to smoke? Were you ever really in Prague if you can go a day without snus? Only order Corona’s in the pub because it “reminds you of when you were on your year abroad”.

Make a point of only looking at the Rioja wines in the supermarket. Chicken wine just doesn’t cut it for you anymore. You are far too cultured for such things. Say goodbye to the lychee ice Lost Mary and say hello to a pack of Camel Golds. Gone are the days of cherry VKs in La Rocca, now you exclusively drink dry white wine on the terrace of a wine bar in Clifton village.

8. Complain about the weather

Don’t forget, you can keep talking about your year abroad for the entirety of fourth year. You mustn’t lose motivation. As soon as the winter months roll in and the sun sets at 4pm, announce to everyone you are just so surprised it could be this dark this early, it wasn’t like that in Australia. Remind everyone how much you miss it, how unaccustomed you are to British winters and how you spent last Christmas lounging on the beach drinking warm bottles of Penguin Sands.