A definitive ranking of how terribly matched all the MAFS UK 2024 couples were

MAFS UK is over for 2024 and I truly don’t know what to do with my life anymore. I haven’t experienced such a rollercoaster of emotions since The Tortured Poets Department. Now we’ve seen all the relationships play out, it’s time to finally rank how brilliantly (or terribly) matched all the MAFS UK 2024 couples were.

So, here are all the MAFS UK 2024 couples, ranked from the worst the best matched.

11. Ryan and Sionainn

The shoelaces have a lot to answer for
(Image via Channel 4)

We’re still not entirely sure about what went down between Ryan and Sionainn. But if their final confrontation really did begin over some shoelaces, then I’m guessing they were never going to last. Ryan seems to have much more of a spark with Hannah than he ever did with Sionainn.

10. Orson and Richelle

A rare image of them in the same room
(Image via Channel 4)

I honestly can’t think of a single thing which Orson and Richelle actually liked about each other. Maybe less people over the age of 40 apply for MAFS UK, so the producers have a tougher time finding people to pair them with?

9. Alex and Holly

Er, so Alex and Holly are back together. I don’t understand how or why. Somebody please enlighten me. Alex and Holly seemed to spend most of their time on MAFS UK 2024 arguing. But I guess they’re getting along now? Alex has even started going on night outs with the rest of the cast.

8. Charlie and Eve

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This feels like it was a million years ago now
(Image via Channel 4)

Yes, I know Charlie and Eve are just objectively the least successful couple of the experiment. The pair were literally the first to leave. But I can see why the experts thought they’d work. Appearance-wise, they were each other’s type on paper. The attraction was definitely, definitely there. It just became obvious pretty quickly that they were fundamentally wrong for each other beyond that.

7. Hannah and Stephen

See, they liked each other for a bit!
(Image via Channel 4)

It’s hard to pass judgement on how well-matched these two were, because we just didn’t really see them together. They seemed to get on well on their wedding day? Hannah still fancied Stephen long after she’d mentally moved on from him. But then the couple never really recovered from one massive argument on their honeymoon.

It’s really difficult to tell whether their problems came from incompatibility or from struggling with the pressure of being on a TV show. We didn’t see enough of them actually together to figure it out. Hannah seems to be getting on much better with Ryan and Orson now, anyway.

6. Amy and Luke

Ah, it started so well. Amy and Luke looked like a fairy couple on the cover of a trashy romantasy book. But it became clear pretty quickly that their love languages were just too different. Amy shows love through quality time and acts of service. Luke shows love by writing letters about terrorising bumholes.

5. Sacha and Ross

I had such high hopes
(Image via Channel 4)

Ugh, I really wanted these two to work out. But we know now from how public Ross has been with his new girlfriend that the couple don’t last. Sacha and Ross were both too fiery to last in the long term. Minor miscommunications blew up into massive rows.

All the astrology girlies will tell you that Saggitarius people need partners who compliment their personalities instead of mirroring them.

4. Polly and Adam

Dinner parties wouldn’t have been the same without them x
(Image via Channel 4)

I change my mind about ten times a day on how compatible these two are. Sometimes it looked like they hated each other’s guts. Sometimes I could totally picture them together in ten years time, stirring up drama at a PTA pub night together. Polly and Adam did seem to get on as friends for a bit, before it became clear they wanted different things from the relationship.

3. Lacey and Nathan

I don’t think their homestay was enough for us to see how they’d work out in the real world
(Image via Channel 4)

Their whole relationship felt very vanilla to me. Lacey and Nathan both seem like very nice and fun people, but we didn’t really see them bond on a deeper level beyond having a nice and fun time together.

It was very considerate of the experts to pair Nathan with someone who’s sister has ADHD, so understands it a bit more about it. But, we know now that Lacey and Nathan’s relationship wasn’t sustainable in the long term. They reportedly split soon after the show.

A source told The Sun: “Nathan and Lacey really tried to make their relationship work in the real world but it just fizzled after a while. The final vows were filmed in February and they were still going strong in April when the reunion was shot, but since then they have called in quits. They were both sad it didn’t work out, but sadly it wasn’t meant to be.”

2. Caspar and Emma

AU Bridget Jones and Mark Darcy
(Image via Channel 4)

Okay, don’t come at me for putting these two so high up. I do know that they called it quits like halfway through the experiment. But I feel like their problem was almost that they were too well-matched.

Caspar wanted a wife who would fit into his family life. The experts took the brief a bit too far and found someone near identical to his twin sister. Emma reminded Caspar too much of his sister, so they struggled to build a romantic spark.

The couple seem to still be friends. They were making each other laugh at the reunion commitment ceremony. Caspar is legit wearing his wedding ring after the experiment because his relationship with Emma is still meaningful to him. So maybe they’re very compatible as friends. But the romance didn’t build between them.

1. Kieran and Kristina

I stopped believing in love altogether when these two broke up. At the start of the experiment, it really felt like their romance was written in the stars. Kieran and Kristina really seemed like one of the best matched MAFS UK couples in 2024 – maybe even ever.

Who but Kristina would find Kieran’s weird false teeth stunt at the altar endearing instead of terrifying? Who but Kieran would express his support of Kristina’s PMDD by cracking a joke about having a hairy buttcrack?

When they came up with a silly song in the bath about all the other couples I truly thought soulmates were real and not a con invented by supermarkets to sell more cards at Valentine’s Day. But alas, it was not to be.

For all the latest MAFS UK 2024 cast member news, scandals, gossip and updates – like The Holy Church of MAFS on Facebook. 

Feature image via Channel 4