BNOC of the Year 2017: Third Year Special

A whole three years of building their reputation

9 years ago

Lisa Currie | Guides

Since nominations opened earlier this month, we have been inundated with applications telling us who they think the biggest name on campus has been this year in Sheffield.

So far we have seen some big names from our first and second year categories, and now we present to you our third years. Three years at Sheffield Uni means they are all worthy for this prestigious title in their own way, but ultimately only one can be crowned BNOC of the year.

Pip Jones, Religious Studies

Miss Jones is such a social butterfly that she is rarely seen at her own house, but you might catch her munching on beans on toast for one of the 18 hours of the day if you’re lucky.

Don’t worry though, because she never fails to keep you updated on Instagram since, according to her mates, she essentially ‘lives her life through an Instagram filter’. Living up to her high levels of sociability, Pip naturally receives a lot of insta likes. She will not settle for anything less than 100.

Her social life continues on into the late hours of the evening where, surprise surprise, she is out of the house again. Most likely she is with fellow members of the lacrosse team enjoying a ‘play date’.

Olly Mellor, Biomedical Science

The most infamous story about Ollie is that, in the early hours of the morning, when walking back from Hopeworks one time, Olly decided to take a shit off the side of a bridge. Shortly afterwards, his deposited faeces was found by one of his unlucky mates. Nonetheless, despite this shitty story, his friends say he’s an all round great guy.

Freddy Smith, History

Freddy is a shower hoarder and huge friend to the animals, especially dogs. Let’s not forget his other love for voluptuous ladies, setting the record at around 300 dates in his Third year alone. This one is a heartbreaker for sure. He is also the most handsome ginger in Sheffield so, if you want to be date number 301 (ish), you’d better get in line girls.

Michael, Philosophy

Michael plays Bass in highly renowned and utterly sensational jazz fusion band ‘Michael and the naughty boys’. Not only is he musically talented, Michael also writes for Forge Press. Clearly he likes getting his voice heard, which is probably why he has been tied to a chair and gagged by his mates on several occasions. Unfortunately, no one was there to stop him that time he took the piss out of a Facebook post in the comments, but it turned out the post was about the Facebook users’ recently deceased grandmother. Ouch.

When a situation arises, even one that requires doing a number two in your own hands, Michael will resort to any means when he’s desperate. Sometimes his bowel movements even make him late to events. He was on one occasion late to a gig because of a “tricky shit” during his usual pre-gig poo.

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The actual night out can raise some issues on occasion too. One time in Corp, Michael suffered a severe wedgie that resulted in his pants being re-fashioned into a thong-like object. Not a great look at all, though the time he used a gas mask in the bedroom probably wasn’t great either.

James Milne, Economics

Known as ‘Dr Wig’, James is known for taking naps on the club bar on a regular basis, but not before he impressively downs seven VK’s in just one minute. This sends him bouncing over to the dance floor of Roar where the ever-famous ‘wig finger flap’ dance move is sure to make an appearance.

Dr Wig’s best achievement though is probably securing a blossoming, international relationship with his Thai bride, Wisa. He is a very family-orientated guy, bringing the whole clan along to a house party in Sheffield one time.

Dr Wig has promised to place a £1,000 tab behind the bar at Roar (7th June) if he wins BNOC of the year. Inevitably, he is guaranteed to present his skills at downing VK’s multiple times throughout the night.

Jonny Cutteridge, Mechanical Engineering

Known by most as “The Brand”, and according to his mates, he most definitely is one. If you’re ever at a party around Broomhill or Crookesmoor, you can be sure to see him there whether he has received an invite or not.

Niall Johnson, Politics

This year, Niall was social sec for the Sheffield Sabrecats Stunt Cheer and is also on the events society. Anyone who knows him, will know he is a super fun, amazing guy who is always up for a night out and has never missed a Roar. Not even a dissertation can stop his bad-ass twerking from making an appearance on the dance floor. Speaking of which, after managing to get 42 cheerleaders to go on tour in Croatia this year, Niall went one step further by twerking in a fountain.

His dance moves alone show he has style but you can’t forget his costumes for socials that are always the clear winner. Last year, the Sabres’ American football team voted Niall as their favourite cheerleader, not surprising since it is literally impossible to say a negative word about him.

Niall showed his appreciation for the Sabres when he got with 20 of them in just one night on tour this year, exceeding the expected amount by 50 per cent after making a bet with a fellow cheerleader. If you ever see Niall on a night out, be sure to buy him four pieces of chicken and chips because if there is one person you would want to buy post-roar chicken for, it’s him.

Ben Westphal-Reed, Engineering and Architecture

A ‘top boy’ according to his friends. After Uni, Ben wishes to use his career to make a difference and work in a non-profit organisation, constructing houses for people in third-world countries. As well as this, he is pro-gender equality, though that doesn’t mean he abstains from turning on the charm to get with girls at Roar. In his freshers year, Ben was unfortunate enough to be given a shaved head with a bleach blonde fringe as his tour hair cut. Let’s hope it grew back quickly.

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Photo Credit: Calvin Merry

Lisa Currie | Guides