What your halls say about you
We all know that the moment you tell someone what halls you are in, you become massively judged.
After the obligatory ‘what’s your name’ ‘what course are you doing’ introductions, the next question always asked is ‘what halls are you in?’. With distinct reputations and stereotypes, prepared to be judged after uttering the words which can deem you a nocturnal party go-er, a rah dahling, or in the case of Bowsden Court, an awkward smile when the inquirer pretends to know where that is..
Richardson ‘Ricky’ Road – Clean Clothes:Optional

The party place. Although resembling a high security prison complete with bare brick walls, Ricky Road is the place to revel in the midst of a constant buzz. Get those tunes on and the alcohol flowing. However, the aftermath of a typical block party is not pretty. A collection of beer cans, soaked playing cards, the odd body crashed out on the floor means one thing, no not to tidy up. To make do with the remaining utensils which haven’t been contaminated by mould. Cereal out of a pan anyone?
Castle Leazes – Scrunchie and Sovereign Ring: Obligatory

Stock up on a pair of Nike Air Max, a Jack Wills gilet and an ‘edgy’ baseball cap, or alternatively a pair of black flatforms and an oversized denim jacket and voila you’re totes a rah. Averaging three Apple Mac laptops per student, you need to be careful where you’re spraying that Cristal. With labyrinth style corridors and catered facilities, Castle Leazes isn’t a world away from boarding school. Although the food is hardly Michelin star, so you may have to take a trip or two to Pret to get your salmon and quinoa protein pot.
Henderson Halls – Bus Pass: Recommended

Yet to find someone who actually opted for this place, Henderson Halls houses the unfortunate rejects who failed to get their desired accommodation. Situated a tad further out, it is well worth looking at the bus route, or if you’re more of the Bradley Wiggins type, a trusty bike. Despite the travel, the halls has an on-site bar for when the trudging up to town in a Newcastle blizzard is too much of a task so students are always up for a drink. Just maybe not up the next morning in time for a lecture..
Liberty Plaza (formerly Central Link) – American Express Card: Necessary

Situated near Newcastle’s business school, it appears you need to own a business to afford the new Liberty Plaza accommodation. A large premium studio, yes studio, costs a staggering £229 per week on a 51 week contract. Dangerously close to the Shark Club, I wonder how many 20p wings you could get on their infamous wing Wednesdays for that price. Man vs Wings anyone?
The stay at home kids – Water Bottle: Unnecessary

Some may refer to these home babies as a ‘mummy’s boy’ never daring to leave the safety of their nest. Yet despite the fact that they won’t be having any after parties, they will also need no hot water bottle, because they won’t be able to see their breath in their rooms. Enjoying the comforts of home and devouring that weekly Sunday roast, of course no one is jealous.







