I ate fried chicken at every major Southern chain

If there is one thing the American South does right, it’s fried chicken. The region is known for international chicken chains like Kentucky Fried Chicken and the sometimes controversial Chick-fil-A.

Originally from Michigan, I could never get into Southern staples like grits (ironically) or sweet tea, but I’ve always loved fried chicken. Even though there are at least 10 Southern food joints littering the main drag of my little Southern town, I realized I hadn’t been to many of them.

I had been on a summer #bikinibody diet paired with a new gym membership, but when I spoke to my editor a week ago, my true personality shined through my low-carb pantry and new sports bras. I decided to go on a quest to find the best fast food fried chicken in the South (and presumably America) while on a hiatus from my summer goals.

While at times this was gluttonous fun, it was sometimes downright horrible. The downright horrible came from eating shitty food twice in a day or realizing I drank more soda in the last week of my life than maybe ever. However, as true artists do, I sacrificed for art. Or in this case, a definitive ranking of Southern fried chicken chains.

At each restaurant, I ordered “the classic,” ate carefully while taking thorough notes, and of course, took Insta-worthy photos of my food. I did not observe caloric intake.

#6: Kentucky Fried Chicken

Look y’all, we all know who Colonel Sanders is. As a kid, you swear he’s still alive and kicking it as the governor of Kentucky. KFC is one of the widest reaching Southern food chains and it has a super catchy acronym. But sadly, from my experience, the most impressive thing about Kentucky Fried Chicken is its marketing.

I went into this meal with high expectations due to my familiarity with the brand. I left my hourly job and was ready to start my true passion: writing about fried foods. KFC seemed like an exciting choice and I endured shit tons of traffic to make it to my local spot.

I ordered a two-piece combo meal with mashed potatoes. The chicken was the most greasy and gritty that I experienced throughout the week. The rest of the food was pretty bland. The experience was nothing special. I went home, took down my team USA pendant and sent my Alabamian great-grandmother a long, long letter about how I’m glad she isn’t from Kentucky. My idyllic view of America was destroyed.

#5: Bojangles

Bojangles was one food chain I have visited many times. But, for science, I had to go at least once this week to write a true review. I brought along my brother, a big advocate of basically any food, like most 17-year-old boys. We both ordered Cajun filet biscuits and Cajun fries, then had a quiet conversation over dinner about how we didn’t get NASCAR while watching our backs to avoid being attacked.

Bojangles feels like the South. It is bright yellow on the inside, the presentation of the food is just disgusting enough to seem legit and they specialize in sweet tea and biscuits. Every menu item includes either “Bo'” or some Southern play on words. Once, I went to a Bojangles where a man brought along his pet raccoon. I love Bojangles for what it is – a Southern experience. However, the food is mediocre.

Popeyes

This was my last stop of the week and honestly, at that point, I was pretty done even looking at fried chicken. Popeyes calls itself a “Louisiana Kitchen” and has one of the more unique tastes of the Southern food chains. It took me by total surprise.

My trip to Popeyes was a little strange because I drove around the building about four times trying to determine if it was open. It was. I didn’t know it was open because the only two employees were in the back dancing to the local hip-hop power station. I was sold on this place the second I heard quiet rumblings of Kanye West’s “Famous” coming from the kitchen.

I ordered the three-piece chicken strip meal. The food is really well-seasoned, well-cooked and it really felt like I was eating real chicken breast rather than a processed meat smoothie. It’s the little things.

#3: Zaxby’s

Zaxby’s feels like home with its small-town memorabilia and chicken mascot. Maybe not a NYC home, but a cute little Georgian home where mama makes you eat your fried chicken before you go back to fishing with your buddies.

I ordered a Zaxby’s Chicken Finger Plate and couldn’t finish the entire thing, even though I really wanted to. The food feels homemade and had the most appetizing appearance of any of the food I ate this week. The only thing I was even slightly concerned about when leaving Zaxby’s? I don’t really understand why a piece of bread is included with every meal. Even if you order a salad, you get a slice of bread. I suspect an under-the-table deal with the bread mafia or an obsession with carbs by upper-management. Pick your poison.

#2: Chick-fil-A

Chick-fil-A is probably the quintessential Southern food experience. The employees are charming Southern belles who are trained to say “my pleasure” to every “thank you.” Yes, Northern and International readers, the Southern lifestyle includes both “thank you” and a response. The food is cooked and seasoned in a unique way to create the Chick-fil-A taste. The chicken is fresh and the “eat mor chikin” ad campaign is just hilarious. The restaurant openly celebrates its Christian values and is closed on Sundays, which earns it respect among many people I know.

Chick-fil-A has done something right, because every location I have ever visited is so busy it has TRAFFIC DIRECTORS. Getting through the parking lot at my local joint took me about 15 minutes, even with friendly Charles there to point me to the right lanes.

I ordered an 8-count nugget meal. The woman who handed me my food complimented my hair and my nails in one sentence. What a doll! As with every Chick-fil-A food experience, this one was very positive. I can’t really explain what makes the slightly red-tinted chicken so addicting. I would say magic but something tells me witchcraft isn’t welcomed in the Chick-fil-A community.

#1: PDQ

I brought #bae along to try this restaurant and we both walked away wishing we were dating PDQ instead of each other. This chain is truly a hidden gem of the South. The chicken is by far the freshest and best prepared of any of the chains I explored. The fries are perfectly seasoned with only salt and pepper, and my location had one of those fancy soda machines where you can add flavors to your drink like a maniacal potion-master.

The employees were delightful – not in a robotic way, but just a “I’m a nice person and I work in fast food” kind of way. I ordered a 3-strip meal at the restaurant. It was more than enough food for one dinner and to my delight, eating it the second time was even better than the first. 10/10. Two meals for $7? From a fast food restaurant? Praise.

After this week, I gained a lot of knowledge and (surprisingly) only a few pounds. Southern fried food is something to be celebrated, along with all the hardworking and kind people who work everyday to bring us our convenient food spots. After all, that is the greatest export of the South: good food and good people.