Here’s what your choice of York Student Club night says about you

If you go to Salvos Wednesday, I don’t want to hear about your sport society, okay?


With Re-Freshers just around the corner, York students are making their way back to campus. We’ve all been missing York’s nightlife – the freshers have picked their favourites, and the rest of us are heading back to the tried and trusted. Everyone’s got their club, and it says a lot about you. Here’s what your choice of student night out in York says about you:

Sunday Revs

Now, Revs on a Sunday: You know where to go. You’ve been at York a while and are probably in your second or third year. You love the smoking area and sit out there for hours every night. You’re into societies, and you adore the absolute chaos of a Sunday Night out.

You’re either super patient or concerningly aggressive when queuing for the bar, there’s literally no in-between. And without fail, you get absolutely leathered every Sunday Night. A 9am Monday is written off, always. Any college, because you are in the right place.

Revs on any other day

If you’re going to Revs on any other night than a Sunday, you’re lost. You’re probably following your STYC who swears down that the music at any other club is rubbish, and that the top floor is where the party really is. Easily convinced, and perhaps gullible, you follow along with other people.

Then the music starts, and its either really really quiet, or it’s deafening. The top floor has no one in it, the downstairs is dead, and you’re stuck pondering why you aren’t anywhere else.

So you’re a newbie, a fresher, or you just like the different levels. You take pictures in the photo booth religiously, and they’re hung up on your wall. Back to Vanbrugh for you.

Wednesday Salvos

You’re in a sport society, and you love it. It’s your entire personality, and you just really don’t care. You go out every Wednesday in elaborate costumes that you’ve bought specially, or told your mum to send up, perhaps even going so far as to wear suits and ties or have paint all over your face. You guys are the reason it’s always packed and everyone else hates you for it.

The stairs are no problem for you, the dance floor is never too full, and your society is the best one out of all of them. Those 8-10pm practises have never seemed so worth it.

You probably have a platinum card, but you just love the experience of the queue! You never go to lectures, you never clean up the kitchen and your flatmates aren’t your biggest fans. James, Derwent or Langwith.

Anyday Jalou

You’re 30 or on a bachelorette party. I’m inclined to think that a two inch heel is part of the dress code for this place, it’s concerning behaviour please stop.

You’re likely a bit more mature than your other flatmates, or you can’t stand a night out on pure shots, and have to go to Jalou to maintain the night on a succession of cocktails. You’re probably on first name terms with your teachers. You never miss a lecture, or if you do, its because there’s something far more important that you should be doing – like cleaning your dress shoes for the next Jalou trip.

You’re in Wentworth College and no one knows where that is. Go do some Apple Sourz shots and embrace your youth.

Friday Ziggy’s

You’re either a second or a third year, or a first year that’s dating a second year (these are easily spotted). The first time you went here you weren’t entirely sure you’d like it, the dark basement looking a bit too dark through those beer goggles.

Then by the third trip, those stairs down to Ziggy’s look like an easy trek, and the bannisters on either side are a gift from God. You love remixes and house music, and you look down on the pop music played in Kuda or Salvos. You probably go to gigs at Dusk and spend the semesters trying build up to first name basis with the DJ.

You regularly go with your flatmates and you have a whole routine worked out with the pres. Probably quite posh, you’re definitely in the East Colleges, or you’re just bored of sport society nights.

Thursday Flares

We all love flares – but not too much. If you’re here, you’re either pre-ing with a sport soc, or you’ve convinced everyone to go here because its free and the music is “so good” – you love musicals but you’re embarrassed. Miley Cyrus and Cotton Eyed Joe don’t faze you, and the lights on the tiny dance floor excite you.

You’re the flatmate that leaves things everywhere, the one who doesn’t wash up, the one who plays their speaker too loudly. It has to be Halifax or Alcuin.

Tuesday Kuda

Undoubtedly the best. You hate crowds, but you still want a lot of people. You’re looking for just that right type of music, the remixes of Freed for Desire and I’m Blue cause you to scream every time. You’re the basic student, but that’s okay, because you’re fun.

The rest of your flat tell you that you go out too much, but you skip between the two bars on the dance floor, and dance on the sofas. Most likely in Langwith or Constantine. You’re happy, and so you should be. Can’t fault it.

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