The girl maths Warwick Uni students are sadly guilty of

You can hate maths all you want (and many of us do), but as you will find, every Warwick student is at least a little guilty of committing some girl maths during their time as a student. Although girl maths typically relates to making financial decisions that are perhaps slightly lacking in the logic department, they actually begin to make a little bit more sense if you just look at them from the right angle. (Just don’t look too closely.)

1. Rootes Food

You justify spending half of your student loans on Rootes food, because you definitely need a little treat after surviving the horrors of the day (it was literally just two lectures where you snapped your friends back and forth the whole time instead of taking notes).

2. Saving on lectures

 You skip your 9am lecture, because you deserve a lie-in after clubbing, or I mean, ”studying”, so hard last night. You are

not being a bad student, though. No, you’re actually being really reasonable, because you’re saving all that money that you would have otherwise spent in Rootes or Cafè Nero again! Besides, all lectures are recorded so you will surely catch up on it… at some point… maybe.

3. Coffee as academic currency

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You get another £4 coffee from Pret but it’s okay since caffeine is essential for productivity which makes it therefore essential for your education. Come to think of it it really should be free with every lecture. So, that basically means that your daily coffee is the one thing holding your entire degree together and making you into a true academic weapon. And all this for only the price of £4! What a steal!

4. Countless society memberships

You join all the societies you can, knowing you won’t go to half of them and will only be reminded about their existence through persistent emails, because you’ve already had to pay the societies membership fee anyway, so might as well get the most out of it now.

5. Dirty Duck socials

Would going to the Dirty Duck another night in a row make a significant indent in your budget? Sure, but socialising is important! How else are you going to make friends at uni? Surely people aren’t expecting you to only hang out with your weird flatmates. So in reality, the benefit greatly outweighs the cost. The best years of your life and all that…

6. Tesco Clubcard

You go to Tesco to do your weekly food shop and thanks to the Clubcard you see the total price go down significantly, so that means you’re actually making money. Yes, treat yourself to that extra pack of biscuits! Maybe that garlic bread as well! Why not.

7. Sports membership

You get the sports membership for all three years upfront, because not only are you saving money this way but also motivating yourself to actually get in that exercise. So what if you’re not actually a gym person and might only go there twice a year… at least you have the option to go and you don’t have to pay anything again… which makes it basically free…

8. Ignored assignments

Sure you might have ignored all those pesky reminders sent by Tabula, about that essay worth 50 per cent of your grade you’ve known about since term one, and had to pull an all nighter. But, it’s okay since now you get to buy yourself a little something that is going to be completely free because it’s just compensation for all the stress you had to endure.

9. Going out

You purposefully pay more money to go clubbing to Coventry or Leamington because what would you even do on campus? Go to Copper Rooms? *shudder* You’re just looking after your mental wellbeing which is worth all the money in the world. Which is also why you pay even more money to get into those clubs faster because what is £10 in the face of being stranded in a long, seemingly never ending queue. You have to spend money to make money right!

10. Making money

You might not be making any money at uni, and your account might be very close to going into overdraft, but it’s alright, you’re just having fun. There’s no need to worry about internships yet or any of that silly placement stuff, because you still have time. Gotta enjoy being a student while you can…Wait, what do you mean this is already year three

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