This is what British band you belong in based on your Manchester uni degree

Although British music comes in all shapes and sizes, so do degrees. We’ve taken it upon ourselves to try and imagine which band you would be in if your UCAS application failed and you turned to the mic instead…

English Literature – The 1975

A somewhat controversial choice but I have yet to meet an English student who doesn’t like them. For most cookie-cutter English girlies , The 1975 encapsulates their “basic-girl-turned-alternative” energy without having to fully commit to the alternative part. You’re either in love with Matty Healy, want to be Matty Healy or you’re as pretentious as him already.

Midwifery/ Nursing – Little Mix

You guys peaked in year 11 but are continuing to ride that high. Luckily you’ve been dubbed the nicest people ever by your peers, except for a few major mean girls that sour the bunch; see Jesy Nelson vs. the rest of the band. Insanely fun to be around when you’re actually out of your hiatus (placement).

Psychology – One Direction

You were definitely one of those people who had to take the day off school on 25th March 2015. Just like One Direction this degree is incredibly popular for good reason, unfortunately a lot of people still see it as a bit shit. The Venn diagram between Directioners and psychology students is a circle.

Politics – Mumford and Sons

I’m sorry you guys are kind of boring and have the interests of a middle aged father of three, and there’s no one I hate getting into arguments with more. It was either them or being assigned BBC News at six.

Geography – Disclosure

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This is who half the Parklife tickets go to each year. Fun to be around but not quite hard enough to be called DnB heads. No, you can’t bring your decks to the house party this weekend, please stop asking.

Art History – Wet Leg

This one is pretty self explanatory. You’re slightly too cool for everyone else, and let everyone know it. You take great pride in listening to bands you’re certain no one else does. You probably change favourite bands every week. The Last Dinner Party are probably next in line, until they release a second album and you get bored of them too.

Sports Science – S Club 7

I mean who didn’t do a “Wake up, Shake up” to their songs in primary school? Like S Club 7’s music, your careers will probably be catered towards children’s fitness, no matter how much you insist “there’s actually a lot of biology involved”.

Japanese Studies – Radiohead

You’re young, free and willing to learn another language from scratch because it sounded “cool”. You need a band that matches your experimental nature. Radiohead offers you some much needed comfort while you endlessly study Japanese grammar and contemplate switching degrees.

Fashion Marketing – Spice Girls

You’ve probably dressed up as one of the spice girls for halloween every year at uni.

Business management – D-Block Europe

After a long hard day of studying stats and economics, what better way to unwind than listening to D-Block Europe. You likely saw D-Block Europe live at Wireless when you were 16 years old and it changed your life. Not one to push the boundaries too far (you picked business management) you’ve settled on a chart regular.

Chemistry – The Chemical Brothers (ha ha ha)

After failing to get into Unsworth, you likely wound up in Oak House. You probably inherited your flats’ communal dj decks, and have been practising for an hour everyday to prepare for your set at XLR. You probably take great pride in letting everyone know that they went to Manchester Uni and played their first ever gig in Owens’ park tower.

Finance – Podcasts

Congratulations! You don’t actually listen to music. Instead you’re far more interested in listening to the Diary of a CEO podcast on spotify, to learn the 10 steps to entrepreneurial success, from the main man himself Steven Bartlett. Despite not being assigned a British band, you’re going to get something that no other degree on this list will, a stable job straight out of uni.

Related articles recommended by the writer:

• A roundup of the worst 12 moments in my Manchester uni house this year
• Pop that pint down: Manchester named as the most sober uni in the UK
• University of Manchester to host four day summer festival to celebrate 200th anniversary