CourtNewsUK is the best way to understand London right now

The world would be so much worse without it

Most tweets are infinitely discardable: they form an endless, relentless parade of shit vines, shit memes and shit beefs. But there is one account that’s different, that reveals a lava of absurdity and brutality under the crust of daily, average London life.

It’s @CourtNewsUK. They’re reporting from courts across London. That’s it. That’s what they do. I could explain it in detail,I could go in-depth and dissect what it all means but I don’t really have to. I’ll let the tweets tweet for themselves.

This is not a parody account, this shit is for real


Meanwhile, in Barnet

Justice is done

To be the man, you have to beat the Western imperialist system

It’s quite scary sometimes

There are still plenty of Cockneys out there, if this is anything to go by

The greatest Ealing comedy never made

Can we get ‘wombat thick old cunt’ printed on some t-shirts please?

As you do



Fat chance of this happening

Celebrity glamour!

Glamour is probably the wrong word actually

You’re the first, the last, my everything

The most important things in life

I mean, they’re not incorrect

So many questions that I don’t want to know the answers to

The course of true love never did run smooth

If you don’t follow it you should start now.