What’s the meanest thing anyone’s ever done to you?

Everything is funny when it happens to someone else

Tragedy plus time equals comedy. 

What could be more tragic than someone being really, really mean to you? Whether it’s something someone said to you, or something they did, meanness can stick in the brain like a splinter.

But time passes, you care less and it becomes funny (ish). I asked Londoners to tell me about the meanest things people have ever done to them.


Kelly, 29


A friend of mine once described me as “doughy”. I literally gave him a slap for it.

Jeff, 25


I’d say that “cum-guzzling cocksucker is definitely” the meanest thing anyone has said to me.

Kevin, 21

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All the mean shit people have said to me relates to me being gay. It’s always something like “faggot”. Usually I ignore it but when I’m drunk it usually makes me kick off. I have hit people for being mean to me before.

Justin, 25

My then best friend did a shit on my floor. He literally did a shit on the floor of my flat. I walked in and he was doing it. I was furious and I was also tripping which made the entire thing even weirder.

I kicked him out of the flat, even though it was the middle of the night, it was raining and he had no clothes on.

We didn’t speak about it for months but we’ve got to the point where we can laugh about it now. I still think it was completely out of order though.

Zara, 21


I can’t really think of anything mean that someone’s done to me. I work for a university call centre in Canada and we spend all day ringing up alumni and asking them for money.

I was speaking to this guy who hadn’t donated for two years and asked him why. He told me it was because of Muslims and I asked him what he meant. He said he wouldn’t give any money to the uni because the uni was giving too much money to Muslims and that if all the Muslims were forced out of the uni he would give us money again.

As a Muslim I found the whole thing incredibly upsetting and offensive.

Anna, 24IMG_1144

It was the day of my brother’s funeral, understandably I was quite upset. A girl there got really, really drunk and kept loudly accusing me of not being a “real sister” to him. She did this about ten times over the course of the day, it was awful.

Lidiya, 22 and Jack, 23
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Lidiya: So it was my birthday and we were all having a big night out. I was wearing quite a short skirt and one of my friends got offended by it and decided to pour an entire pint over the top of my head, calling me a “slag” as she did so. I didn’t retaliate in anyway, I ran outside and cried.

Jack: I can’t really think of anything that mean. I hate it when people don’t let you get off the tube when the doors open, does that count?