Who are the girls who still won’t admit to watching porn?

Talking about how much you hate Brazzers doesn’t make you any more of a feminist

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Today, Marie Claire announced pretty depressing stats which said only a third of women admit to watching porn “at least once a week”.

The results came as part of a project with British-but-bizarrely-transatlantic photographer Amanda de Cadenet, who wanted to find out how “porn and porn culture affect your life” and has spent two years – two entire years – doing it.

But the findings to the study are pretty ridiculous. Are we really supposed to believe two thirds of women just never watch porn? And that of the few brave and ground breaking souls who will admit to it, 62 per cent are watching on their phones?

The whole thing comes across as insanely dated, promising follow ups with “feminist pornographers” and a piece on “porn every feminist should watch”. It’s not a brave new world, and it’s certainly not going to make girls feel like they can only watch organic-free-range-feminist-porn-where-absolutely-nobody-is-being-oppressed, logging out of Pinterest and huddling under the covers in the dark, desperately trying to see the detail in Sasha Grey’s DP scene on their iPhone 6’s 4.7″ screen.

Only half of the women they spoke to said that porn had “positively influenced their sex lives and relationships” because it helped them learn more about sex. Only half? It goes without saying that a lot of porn is theatrics. Nobody really screams, and yeah, squirting probably doesn’t exist, but it’s difficult to accept that only half of us will say that porn probably helps your gag reflex and teaches you what angles you look best on top.

Just having some me time

There’s a massive misconception that hating porn is somehow feminist. 56 per cent of the women Marie Claire spoke to said they were “concerned about how the industry treats women and perpetuates negative stereotypes”. It’s the same misconception which has led to the development of hazy-lensed, boring, “female friendly” pornography.

There’s nothing feminist about making other women feel bad about something they inherently enjoy, or wrapping us up in cotton wool, saying that we definitely wouldn’t enjoy the kind of porn men have the stomach for, so we have our own pink fluffy version, where maybe they fall in love at the end and buy a Bichon Frise together. There’s certainly nothing feminist about telling girls what they “should be watching” so they can still be in The Club.

We’ve now accepted the fact that girls enjoy sex, and openly shaming anyone for that is practically a cardinal sin. So why is it so different for porn? Dull “reaching out” videos, anonymous surveys and female friendly porn only mean give more weight to the myth that girls liking porn is unnatural or special, or that they’re somehow a “cool girl” for being different and enjoying it.

But it’s not, and you’re not, everyone you know does. They probably finger themselves too.