Gym Etiquette

The gym is a foreboding place at the best of times, with burly men and toned women sweating, grunting and screaming at one another to do “one more rep!” or “get aggressive with the bar!”, the experience can often be intimidating and somewhat off-putting for the regular Joe.

Do you even lift, bro?

What makes the gym even more threatening is the pressure to follow the latest gym fad.

Whether that be the latest trend in footwear, to seem quirky and unique with your choice of clothing or just the pressure to always look exceedingly attractive. The gym exerts an immense amount of pressure on its users to not only get in shape, but also to be as cool as possible whilst doing so.

The pressure may be immense, however here are a few things that should be avoided at all costs when working out:

Clothing with quirky catchphrases

You really aren’t

T-shirts with slogans are, for some bizarre reason, a big hit at the gym. But please don’t be lured in to wearing one; you don’t look like a fun, quirky person, you just look like a complete tool.

No one wants to read your semi-witty catchphrase as you strut through the gym thinking you’re the top dog. Leave it at home. In fact how about you just burn it?

Drinking a protein shake whilst working out

Really?

We all see that one person, usually a relative newbie, waltzing around the gym with just enough confidence and more than enough stupidity to think that drinking a protein shake mid-workout makes them look like a gym pro. Well I’m afraid it doesn’t.

Most Read

‘F*ck y’all’: Woman issues blistering response after Usher kicked her off-stage mid-lap dance

Ok, here’s exactly what Elicia from Love Island 2026’s job is and what she does on the trains

An investigation into *that* filthy ‘leaked’ Justin Bieber video, as people demand an OnlyFans

You just look like you haven’t read the ‘recommended use’ section on the back of your overpriced tub of whey. It says ‘before and after training’ for a reason people, stick to the guidelines. Keep it in the changing room until AFTER your workout.

Wearing full makeup to the gym

Just foundation…

Ladies, and some gentlemen too I suppose, a full face of makeup is not a good look in the gym.

Did you not stop to think that working up a sweat would wreak havoc upon your artfully decorated visage?

When you wipe away the sweat after those grueling miles on the treadmill, guess what? You’re wiping away your makeup too, and we can really tell the difference. The less makeup, the better.

Screaming in the gym

Yeah Buddy!

Ah, screaming in the gym. Nothing says you’re working as hard as possible, more than a harsh, guttural howl.

That’s not to say that letting out a groan as you lift those ‘heavy ass weights’ is a bad thing. However, if I can hear you yelping from the other end of the gym then please refrain, you sound slightly ridiculous, especially if you’re not even lifting that much.

And if you can’t stick to these simple guidelines, stick to running. Preferably in the opposite direction to me.