I’m no longer afraid to admit I’m a Democrat in the South

If you were to ask me who my favorite politician is, I would reply “President Obama” in less than two seconds. I was raised a Democrat, even though as a child, I did not quite grasp what that entailed.

I was born during the Clinton era in 1997. My first distinct memory of politics was when Senator John Kerry ran against President Bush in 2004. My dad took me to vote with him after my ballet class on a Tuesday night. They gave me a kids ballot and I really thought what I put on that card mattered.

I’m not going to lie, I tried to see what my dad was writing down. When we walked out hand in hand I said: “Dad, I voted from Mr. Kerry. Is that OK? Did you vote for him?” My dad responded: “You can vote for whoever you want to vote for. It’s OK.” I didn’t understand it at the time, but that was my first step into the world of politics.

Fast forward to the 2008 presidential election between Senator John McCain and President Obama when I had just started middle school. I remember running into my parents’ room and saying, “Dad, today Obama is going to be president.” He smiled and told me to get ready for school.

That morning, I thought about my fifth grade teacher. She always told me 2008 would be a big year. I would start middle school and get braces. I would learn about real bullying and making new friends. I would also be able to remember the year a black man could possibly win the presidential election. He did win and I do remember. The next day at school, I remember seeing a huge group of sixth graders chanting “Obama” in the courtyard. I joined in and decided that would be the day I would become a Democrat.

Around that time, I started making a lot of friends in my hometown, more than the friends I was making at school. But these people had been raised differently than I was. They were more conservative than me, but I didn’t notice until right around election time.

I was ecstatic President Obama was running again. But some of my new friends weren’t as excited as I was. In fact, they were Mitt Romney supporters and felt free to share it all over social media. And because I was a sophomore in high school who didn’t know any better, I refused to talk about my political beliefs.

I didn’t respond to any tweets or messages I saw about the election. I tried to avoid talking to my friends who I considered “right-wing conservative.” And over the next three years, I censored anything I said to them. Not because I was afraid to speak my beliefs, but because I was afraid to offend them.

They were my best friends. I didn’t want them to stop liking me because I was a Democrat. And over the years, anytime politics were brought up, I wouldn’t respond. I would smile and nod, even if I didn’t agree with what they were saying. I made myself smaller to avoid confrontation. And as hard as this is to admit, I almost felt embarrassed to be a liberal living in the South.

In 2012 in North Carolina, Amendment 1 was passed on May 8. Amendment 1 made it unconstitutional for the state to recognize same-sex marriages in North Carolina. I had a close friend who was immediately affected by the amendment, and that day I saw her break down in tears. I was infuriated.

This woman was and still is one of the best people I had ever met. And here were people trying to belittle her and her family. That’s when I realized how important politics were to everyday life and how important they were to me. That was when I realized making myself smaller wouldn’t help anyone.

It took a while, four years to be exact, but here I am. Those four years weren’t easy. I still didn’t want to piss off my friends, so I avoided talking politics with them. Honestly, I still try to avoid it at all costs. But I spent all last week watching the Democratic Nation Convention, crying over the Obamas and BAWLING over the fact the Democratic party nominated the first female nominee. And I tweeted, Facebooked and Snapchatted it all.

Don’t get me wrong, I do not under any circumstances blame my friends for my own downplay as a Democrat. To be completely honest, I think I am a better Democrat for it. I see where people are coming from when they express their opinions on gun control and abortion laws. I understand why they feel safer with a gun in their house, and why they don’t believe in gay marriage equality. I may not agree with their stance, but I respect and admire the fact they have their own opinions and aren’t scared to share it with the world.

I am a firm believer women’s rights are human rights that we must fight for. I am a firm believer we all must pay taxes and do our part to help society, even the upper elite. I am pro-choice. I believe love is love and we should all be free to marry who we choose. I believe in the left wing and choose to put my faith in their candidate.

But I believe I am a better person because I can believe in all these things but also understand why others don’t. Being a Democrat in the South isn’t easy, but if you start listening to those around you and accept you cannot change their views, you’ll find it a little easier to talk and understand others.