Patrick Maguire

Patrick Maguire
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Posts

Lazy housemates will always be better than uptight ones

Please stop putting post-it notes on my leftovers

The most irritating things about going to a restaurant

Yes, everything is alright with my food thanks

Long-haul flights are the worst thing in the world

Tell me again why I can’t listen to my iPod during take-off

Every person you’ll try and sleep with at home this Christmas

Get the Coronas in

UCL’s internet is down after a cyber attack

At least you’ve got an excuse not to do your essay

How are people still falling for the fake hysteria about renting in London?

Of course nobody’s going to rent a tent in a living room

If you believe the QS employability rankings, you’re off the charts deluded

It’s still only a 2:1 from Aston mate

The debate with George Galloway has been cancelled

What an anticlimax

GQ’s dictionary of modern slang is a monument to lame white men

It thinks you need to be told what ‘bae’ and ‘squad’ mean

Clubbing in London is a soul-destroying ordeal

Where dreams go to die

UCL likely to have ‘broken the law’ during rent strike

They told protesters they could be prevented from graduating

If the police want to be taken seriously, they need to stop the cringe Twitter jokes

It’s helping nobody

If the police want to be taken seriously, they need to stop the cringe Twitter jokes

It’s helping nobody

Wearing a suit to watch James Bond won’t make you any more of a man

You’re not Roger Moore, your mum still does your ironing

Wearing a suit to watch James Bond won’t make you any more of a man

You’re not Roger Moore, your mum still does your ironing

The cute-ification of uni is becoming unbearable

Higher education is collapsing while you’re at the petting zoo

The cute-ification of uni is becoming unbearable

Higher education is collapsing while you’re at the petting zoo

UCL ranked 21st in the world by yet another league table

Does anyone still care about these?

Posh boys should feel guilty about a lot of things but listening to dubstep isn’t one of them

It’s time to welcome the Skepta-loving rich list in from the cold

Posh boys should feel guilty about a lot of things but listening to dubstep isn’t one of them

It’s time to welcome the Skepta-loving rich list in from the cold

Banning sombreros? As long as SUs keep picking these fights, they’ll be ridiculed

Patrick Maguire on why a Mexican hat isn’t racist

Banning sombreros? As long as SUs keep picking these fights, they’ll be ridiculed

Patrick Maguire on why a Mexican hat isn’t racist

Yes, top-knots are ridiculous but banning them from campus is bizarre

A Mormon-run uni in America has deemed the man bun an ‘extreme hairstyle’

Yes, top-knots are ridiculous but banning them from campus is bizarre

A Mormon-run uni in America has deemed the man bun an ‘extreme hairstyle’

If police are going to start drug testing clubbers, we may as well all stay at home

Itemisers and sniffer dogs are the latest weapons in the war on fun

If police are going to start drug testing clubbers, we may as well all stay at home

Itemisers and sniffer dogs are the latest weapons in the war on fun

Mass fraud allegations hit Union election winners

Asad Khan had votes deducted but still won

Ex-Phineas quizmaster released without charge after taking on the EDL

The UCLU sabb officer was arrested in the West Midlands on Saturday

Is this the hardest working second year at UCL?

Read Thines Ganeshamoorthy’s incredible story

Is this the hardest working second year at UCL?

Read Thines Ganeshamoorthy’s incredible story

UCLU held a referendum and only 98 people cared

7,500 students will no longer have a full-time union rep

UCLU to keep ban for the tabloid they never sold

The Sun won’t come out in campus shops…even without the nipples

UCLU to keep ban for the tabloid they never sold

The Sun won’t come out in campus shops…even without the nipples

What’s happening to London nightlife? Plastic People has shut forever

It’s game over for Shoreditch’s finest

Reprieve for liberation officers as reforms defeated at chaotic union meeting

Meeting adjourned after Proposal 3 fails to pass despite winning a 56% majority

UCL accused of staff sex abuse ‘cover up’

University closes sexual harassment exhibition

Provost left red-faced by Fossil Free die-in

Fossil Free UCL have stepped up their campaign…watch them mess up Michael Arthur’s commute

Women’s Officer could be axed under proposals from 26 societies

Full time BME officer would also go under revolutionary proposals

UKIP backed free education demo when NUS didn’t

Which side are you on?

Proud threatened with closure as club boss lashes out at council killjoys

He’s also sick of you “rich little babies” having your phones robbed

BREAKING: Protesters gather ahead of controversial Israeli ambassador visit

UCLU Friends of Palestine gather in college buildings on Bedford Way in a demonstration against Daniel Taub

UCLU want you to bunk off on Wednesdays

The Union Council last night resolved to let you skive if your lectures clash with societies or sport

Union outcry as UCL hosts conference for group accused of sexism and Islamophobia

The controversial Alliance for Workers’ Liberty will be on campus this weekend

Confusion as ‘scab ULU’ remove Holocaust memorial plaque without explanation

Students recently noticed its disappearance

UCLU offer support to NUS officer who opposed anti-ISIS motion

The Birmingham student received racist and misogynistic abuse, as well as death threats

Apathy wins autumn elections as 94 per cent of you don’t bother voting

That’s over 27,000

Union reprimand Culture Club candidates after email howler breaks election rules

Drama Soc promoted Culture Club bloc on its email circular

‘And it was all Bello’: Watch the only good thing to come out of #Bellogate

Come for the puns, stay for the knitwear