The only relation strength has to my sexual assault is how strong I am as a survivor

Kellyanne Conway, Trump’s newest campaign manager, said some things about rape in 2013, and her words are coming back to haunt her. In 2013, Conway spoke out against the Pentagon lifting the ban on women in combat. She said the military needs to be as capable and efficient as possible, and according to Conway the military cannot be these things when women are on the front lines.

Conway furthered her misogyny by saying rape would not happen if women were as strong as men.

“If we were physiologically, not mentally, emotionally, professionally equal to men, if we were physiologically as strong as men, rape would not exist. You would be able to defend yourself and fight him off,” Conway said.

First, I want to point out women are not the only people who get raped. Yes, the majority of rapes do happen to women, but not all. Also, not all sexual assaults occur between males and females. It is estimated that one in three lesbian women have been sexually assaulted by another woman. 

Second, as someone who has been sexually assaulted, I can say with 100 percent certainty my experience would not have been any different if I had been physically stronger.

I could have been the size of an NFL linebacker, and I still would have been sexually assaulted.

It wasn’t my lack of strength that made me unable to stop the perpetrator – it was the paralyzing fear that stopped me from doing anything at all. It was the trust I had in this human being whom I knew really well. It was the fact I was so caught off guard by what was happening to me. It was a reaction of numbness, hoping that if I didn’t fight back everything would be over sooner. It was a reaction created by the attitudes of society. The attitudes that tell me because I was drinking or wearing tight clothing I had some how asked for this to be my fate, and because I had asked for it, I didn’t deserve to fight back.

My reaction was rooted in fear, misogynistic attitudes and surprise.

It was a reaction similar to that of many other women, and it has nothing to do with physical weakness, but it has everything to do with women being taught this is what they deserve or this is somehow their fault. It has everything to do with victim blaming and that is exactly what Conway’s statement has successfully achieved.

Conway, who is a person of influence to a man who could potentially be running this country, is speaking out about how rape only exists because women are physiologically weaker?

She is taking the blame off of the perpetrator who should be taught not to rape and placing it on the victim who is instead being told to be stronger.

Enough is enough.

It’s time for the women of this nation to stand up, demand respect, and have their voices heard.

If the women Trump surrounds himself with don’t even view rape as a problem that needs to be solved by placing the blame on the perpetrator instead of the victim, how will women be protected if he becomes president?

I would not feel safe if this man was the leader of the free world, and I would not want my children to live in a world where people believe rape only occurs because women are weaker than men.

We need to be “strong enough” to stand up and fight back against this misogyny, because I know the only relation strength has to my sexual assault is how strong I am now as a survivor.