A guy broke into the Lutheran student center and slept there last night

Five minutes from the end of my opening shift in the WIC women’s locker room, right as my replacement arrived, my roommate, Anna, sent me a text asking if I was OK. It turns out the person snoozing on my couch this morning when I left at 5:30 had not  been one of my roommate’s friends but a drunk student who broke in through the back door and crash-landed in our living room.

Lovely. Thank you, Little 500 week.

If you saw a RecSports employee frantically running across campus this morning, that was me. Hello. When I arrived, there were four squad cars in the alley behind the University Lutheran Church student center (ULu), and my roommates and the ULu Pastor all chatting with officers from both IUPD and BPD. The student was still drunk when he was taken away by BPD.

This morning, I got up for work like usual. As I was leaving, I went to grab the novel I am reading off the coffee table in the living room. There isn’t normally a sleeping man on the couch when I leave in the mornings, but I thought it was simply a roommate’s friend who’d crashed there for the night. I didn’t go into the kitchen, so I didn’t notice the broken glass on the floor, or the fact a glass panel on the back door had been punched out.

I went to work as happy as any sleepy college student with an opening shift could be when the frat next door keeps you up with their partying — because seriously, Little 5? So, imagine my surprise when I got the text from one of my roommates who was leaving to babysit and was about to use the back door to get to her car.

My roommate, Anna, had also seen the stranger on the couch but thought it was me — his outfit resembled my RecSports uniform and he had our afghan over his face. After seeing the broken back window, she whipped the blanket off of him and shouted, “Do I know you!?”

Living at University Lutheran Church’s student center is an amazing experience. Not only do I not pay a monthly rent, but I get to serve in the church on a daily basis, which is something I find amazing. Throw in the fact that I live with two close friends and my future sister-in-law, and you have a dream package.

However, because of our location on the corner of 7th and Fess (right next door to a frat), there has been a bit of a problem in the past with vandalism of the property, usually by drunk students. The very first night I lived here, the front windows were ripped out and shattered, and several things on our front lawn were damaged or destroyed.

Apparently, the student had been so drunk, he thought he was at a friends place somewhere on North Jordan. I too punch in the windows of friends’ back doors and sleep wasted on their couches until I’m removed by the police — wait, no I don’t. Fortunately, each of us lock our doors every night and he was wasted enough that nothing happened. There is a reason I have previously left town during Little 5 weekend.

Moral of the story?

1. Don’t get wasted and break into houses/churches.
2. The effects of Little 500 are actually the worst.

Also, he bled on our couch. Don’t bleed on other people’s couches. It’s rude.