Meet the woman who invited all of Tallahassee to her Thanksgiving dinner

‘All that matters is how you treat others’

Amongst the typical advertisements for subleases and lost IDs, sometimes while on FSU Craigslist, you run into an absolute gem. In this case, that gem is Valerie “Suzi Freaking Sunshine.” Valerie recently posted on the popular Facebook group, stating if anyone needed a place to go for Thanksgiving, the doors of her home were open. The reception she got was unexpected, with over a thousand likes on the post and over 100 comments, and dozens of private messages to her inbox.

The Tab spoke with Valerie about her Thanksgiving dinner, and how she got the idea to allow college strangers into her home, and what it means to her.

What do you think about the reception you’ve gotten from your Facebook posting?

The response this year has been amazing. Previous years a couple dozen people would like the post, a few would say nice things and a handful would show up. This year is different. There have been over 1,600 likes and over 100 comments and a couple dozen messages and they are still coming in. It’s funny to me, I have been inviting strangers on Facebook to come for Thanksgiving for probably about five or six years, but this is the first time the response has been so overwhelming. There have been over 3,500 likes total if I combine them all, just this year. I’ve heard from a lot of college kids, but also adults, small families and a few seniors as well.

When I started doing this it was all about the college kids, because I thought “oh my gosh, if my kids were in another city all alone, I couldn’t imagine if they didn’t have somewhere to go, if someones table didn’t invite them.” I have seven kids and a lot of spare kids now.

So many people have written me the nicest notes and made the nicest comments. I think it has lot to do with the recent election and people feeling hopeless and fear that we are in an unkind America. I confess, I have been worried about the same thing. I believe in peace and love and taking care of each other, and it doesn’t matter who are, what the color of you skin is, how big your bank account is or who you sleep with at night. All that matters is how you treat people, how you leave the world, better than you got it. I’m super impressed with the people who show up at our Thanksgiving dinners. It takes a lot of bravery to get in your car and drive to someones house you don’t know, get out and walk to the door on a holiday. But I know if they can get to the door we will ease their nerves when they meet the family.

How many people are you anticipating to come to your dinner?

By today, anywhere between 40 and 100 people. Some are my family — my kids, spouses, local people who started coming a few years ago. There are two different guys who have been coming every year since we opened our home on Thanksgiving. Sometimes they bring dates or friends. Sometimes they come alone. But they always come. I won’t see them for a whole year, but I know on Thanksgiving they will be at my house. Whenever they show up, we all just laugh because we know that it’s officially Thanksgiving.

My family, we are a “crazy” kind of normal.  I’m not religious, but my husband prays before every meal. I believe in love. We are a family that doesn’t believe in the same things, but we all believe in love and peace, and I think [ultimately] it is all the same.

Where do you find it in your heart to want to take care of people? How have you gotten so many people to open up to you and tell you their stories?

My Facebook name is Suzi Freaking Sunshine — it’s what my husband called me because I’m so positive and happy all the time. I married an awesome, beautiful man, and he’ll say to me “it doesn’t matter if we are broke, life is throwing curve balls, the weather is trying to kill us you still find the positive spin on everything. How can you be so happy?” and I’ll say “we have food, a house and so much love”. So he says to me, “you truly are Suzi Friggin Sunshine all the time!” He was trying to be kindly sarcastic but I took it as a compliment and decided to “own” the name.

I’m very blessed. I think I’m easy for people to talk to because they can feel that I don’t judge and that I legitimately care. I’ve been through a lot, and I don’t have a problem telling my stories. I was a homeless teenager, and I still finished high school, and did well in my college classes. As a young woman, I was kidnapped and raped by a stranger. Then I was in an abusive relationship. Even though I’ve been through a lot of stuff, I never let any of it keep me down or change who I am, it just made me stronger. I didn’t even realize that parts of my life was bad until I started doing outreach with teens.

People open up to me, and it’s one of my blessings, people are my blessing for sure. Some people just click with people, and I’m one of them. I’m focused on outreach, I collect stuff for people in need. If someone in need is looking for clothes or food, if I don’t have it, I go find them. If we hear of a house fire or someone going through a hard time and getting on their own who has a need, we discover the need and start networking. I think everyone is addicted to something. I like helping people, it makes me feel really good inside. It’s a selfish, wonderful thing.

This community is so great, and the support from all the kids has meant more to me than my dinner could mean to my guests. The community has restored my faith that there is more kind people in the world than not.

Of all the messages you’ve gotten, which ones stuck out to you the most, or meant the most to you?

There is one lady who is coming who is here from Columbia. She came here, married a guy, they divorced and now she doesn’t know anybody. She’s alone. She works two jobs and is saving for a car. It’s crazy how you connect with people. To ease her mind I let her know that my daughters boyfriend is Columbian also and he will be here, so she will have a common bond with someone right away. She doesn’t have a car, but I told her “don’t let a that discourage you.” We have plenty of people who can give her a ride. My husband and two of my kids said they will be happy to pick up anyone who needs a ride. Some of us think we’re really alone, and maybe we have family one or six hours away — this lady is in a different country by herself.

Another girl messaged me, she’s a single mom with three kids. She’s been in Tallahassee for about two years. She moved here from California, and she told me that she has never felt welcome here, she felt like people in Tallahassee weren’t friendly or felt comfortable with her, so she feels alone a lot of the time and doesn’t have anyone here to enjoy holidays with. She was in foster care as a child, emancipated as teenager, she told her whole story in one Facebook message. When she got done I told her “well, you just found your Tallahassee family, look no further, you will be just fine.”

I’ve also heard from a girl from China who now lives in Tallahassee. She said she was going to sit home alone in her apartment like she always does, but she said “you know what, something tells me I should come there,” and I told her “well you should.” If nothing else, she’d come, be overwhelmed by my loud family, and go home appreciating the peace and quiet from her own apartment.

There’s a single mom who’s nine months pregnant, due in a week, and she asked me “if I’m not in the hospital, can I come?” People ask me “do you have room for me?” And I tell them I have room for anybody. We can make room, we can always make it happen, and if you want to bring someone and you get a chance to come, bring them. We can always make more room.

All of the stories I’ve heard have been great, I’ve even heard from people who wish they wouldn’t have made other plans, just so they can be a part of this. I’m humbled, I’m absolutely humbled. Were so blessed to be in this community, there is so much love here, so many great great people who care about each other without judgement. People have asked me if they can donate, but it doesn’t cost that much extra to feed a few more people at Thanksgiving. I don’t ever want anyone to think that I throw these dinners so other people will donate. I do it because it’s the right thing to do.

It’s so cool because people have written and asked how they can help. There was a guy who wrote me at 5am and said he had chills and if there was anything he can do to help. I told him “you can pray that I don’t say too many curse words, and that the weather is good.” People ask why I don’t encourage people to bring something, and it’s because I don’t want to discourage anyone from coming. Some people won’t come if they don’t have anything to bring, so I don’t want anyone to ever feel that way, that’s why we’re having it, in case you don’t have anything, or if you need something fun to do or feel lonely. So I provide plenty of food and try to keep everyone feeling happy they came.

I’m a mother hen, and if you come to my house to eat, you’re gonna take home a plate of leftovers. It’s been so good for my soul for people to care so much and for so many people to have the courage to say “can I come?” I love people. I love to cook, I love to eat, I love to feed people. So I always joke “I’m a fluffy girl. I clearly cook well. Put your comfy pants on and join me!”

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