All the weird things York students do without even realising they’re weird

Sitting in the Tiki van with your pals like it’s the most normal thing in the world


When you tell people you go to York, images of ancient, crumbling city walls and Betty's Tea Rooms immediately come to mind. They imagine you leading a quaint university existence in a pretty Northern town. If only they knew how weird some of the shit we get up to really is.

Rolling down what is essentially a medium to large hill (Clifford's Tower) after a night out

To those who haven't done this, you're missing out. Clambering up the side of a hill whilst completely ignoring the stairs post Salvo's seems like a perfectly normal thing to do. What better way to end a night than rolling down Clifford's Tower, losing literally all of your possessions but feeling victorious once you reach the bottom.

Getting pissy because Nisa should sound like 'nee-sa' and not 'nicer'

I don't care how the presenter on Nisa radio (what a dream job that is) says it while I'm queuing to buy an underwhelming frozen pizza for dinner, it's definitely 'nee-sa'.

Bitch about seminars in King's Manor, because wtf, why

The merging of a beautiful building from the 1500s with a concrete monstrosity from the 1960s (it's the York way). According to Google it's a 20 minute bus ride to King's Manor from the uni, so why does it feel like it takes three days?!

Boast about the fact that we have the largest man-made plastic-bottomed lake in Europe like it's something to be proud of

And then constantly lose your football to the rank water and sacrifice both your health and dignity whilst trying to retrieve it. Plus, it's still only like two feet deep, so it's more like the largest plastic-bottomed puddle in Europe.

Teaching every fresher the "Derwent has asbestos" chant within their first 48 hours at UoY

Every college has a chant, and if you don't scream yours across the top deck of the 66 while banging the roof as hard as you can on the first night of freshers, you're doing something wrong.

Navigating an obstacle course of automatic doors to get into the library

Why are there so many doors and why do so few of them open? Caring about the automatic doors on our campus in general is very York, so much so that someone wrote an entire article about.

RIP Willow (never forget)

Despite the final year group to have stepped foot in Willow finally graduating this summer, this will not stop post-graduates telling war stories about what Willow used to be like. "Come hither freshers, let me tell you about the mythical beast that was Willow, and it's stoic demagogue Tommy Fong."

Efes being more oil than pizza

Can I have extra pepperoni with my oil please?

Can I have extra pepperoni with my oil please?

It's hard to actually eat the pizza when all the toppings slide off every time you lift a slice up.

Just accepting that there is goose shit, everywhere

You'll hoover your room the first fifteen times you tread goose shit into the carpet, but by the 400th time you'll have probably stopped caring.

Competition to get those blue chairs in the lib

I have a theory that the people who sit in those blue chairs have been there since 2014. Never moving, living off crumbs that have fallen down the back of their seat. Constantly doing seminar reading for seminars they never actually attend because God forbid they lost their tall, blue throne.

How annoying it is to now need your student card to get into lib

Popping down to the cafe to be faced with the same overpriced, stale sandwich can only be worsened by leaving your card on your desk and having to go and ask reception to let you back in like the big, dumb, forgetful idiot you are.

Talking about Yoyo prizes like it's free money

I've honestly never seen Yoyo anywhere else. Why us? Why are we the chosen ones who have to unreasonably pay an extra 20p on purchases under £5. Oh well, it's worth it for a FREE pitcher and sharing nachos that you've been saving up those precious points for since first year!!

Complaining about the 66 and just accepting you will not be able to see out the window whilst travelling .

Sometimes you can't even tell what the weather is like outside from inside the 66. And you'll get the fright off your life when the bus drives through some tree branches and it sounds like you're suddenly in the London Blitz.

Complaining about the trek to Hes East even though its literally ten minutes away

You will never receive more sympathy than when you tell someone you have a lecture to get to on Hes East. Battling through the gale force winds and driving rain requires someone of Bear Grylls' skills, not a frail Law student.

Having full-blown arguments about which is the best Browns' sandwich even though the amount of mayo means they all basically taste the same

The fight at 1:30pm over sandwiches in Browns comes as second nature to us. You might go for a different one each time and enjoy them equally. Why's this you ask? They literally all taste of mayo (except the veggie ones, they taste of nothing).

Being weirdly defensive about where you sit in the library

It's funny how people who are going to get a 2:2 naturally migrate to Harry Fairhurst. Thinking it's completely acceptable to give evils for prolonged periods of time to the poor newcomer in Burton who forgot to turn their phone off silent. If you're not doing serious work in there, then just get out.