15 of some of the most soul-destroying things ever said by Oxford tutors

8) 😂 

We asked you what the meanest thing an Oxford tutor ever said to you was, and you DELIVERED. Unfortunately some had to be missed because there were just so many good ones, but please know your pain was recognised.

Here’s a rundown of some of the brutal ones; let’s begin this one with the more subtle criticism.

1) ‘You have shown no verbal or written evidence that you have retained any of the content’

This one must have stung after getting through the eight hour reading list.

2) ‘This is a great essay…for an A Level student’

Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind, and that is clearly the motto of this tutor.

3) ‘What happened this week?’

One of my particular favourites was this rather withering comment.

4) ‘Please put in a better effort, literally half of the tutorial has been missed’

An absolute stinger.

5) ‘It’s very clear that you just don’t understand any of this’

It really burns when you hand in an essay, for which you passed on going out to get finished, and you receive this as feedback.

6) The student ‘needs to stop letting things in their life affect their studies’

This comment was made during May 2020 lockdown. The cheek.

7) ‘If you can’t recover from the flu and do more work you will have to rusticate’

8) 😂 

Everyone loves an emoji, especially when it is a summative comment on your 2,500 word essay.

9) ‘As moronic as it gets’

Yes, that was really said.

10) ‘It doesn’t work like that, this is not University Challenge’

11) ‘This bar is a disaster’

This pearler from one student’s composition task will makes me laugh and weep at the same time.

12) ‘Your heart was in the right place. Next time, don’t leave your brain behind’

At least they tried?

13) ‘It might have helped if you proof read this essay before you sent it to me’

The particular victim of this comment wants you to know that they actually proof read their essay three individual times.

14) ‘Tortured syntax’

15) ‘Absolute bollocks’

Recommended by the writer:

A rundown of every ick you’ll ever experience before leaving Oxford uni

‘No vaccine mandates’: Anti-tax protest held in Oxford this Saturday

A definitive ranking of Oxford clubs from least to most vibes