Here’s how to procrastinate in the Robbo

Goodbye trebles, hello Robbo

Coming hand in hand with revision is our old friend procrastination and in the Robbo we have a special way of doing it.

Library Boyfriends and Girlfriends

Exams mean an end to our usual Wednesday night conquests at the palace, and in an attempt to forget the loneliness in come the library boyfriends and girlfriends. Gazing wistfully at the solid nine a few chairs away from you its very easy to start imagining saucy snogs behind the bookcases, and before you know it you’ve spent 45 minutes deciding what the name of your dog is going to be. While you’re at it why not venture to YikYak and attempt to send them a cryptic message declaring your love, it must’ve worked for someone right?

Reading The Tab

Let’s not lie, as you’re reading this you are currently in the Robbo, 3000 word essay in front of you, 400 words down. It’s no secret that most of our readers are heavy procrastinators, but we wouldn’t have it any other way. It gives us the excuse to write about hamsters and make quizzes like ‘what kind of beer are you?’ and you’ll still actually read our stuff. So procrastinate away.


It’s definitely possible for you to spend at least half of your student loan in the beloved Robbo café, especially when you are taking about 7 coffee breaks a day. ‘Anyone fancy a coffee?’ you casually write on the group chat, as you desperately try to ignore the amount of work you have left to do. You tell yourself that the caffeine will actually be really beneficial and give you some miracle brainwave for your essay. In reality you spend 2 hours deciphering texts from that person you’re seeing (but you’re definitely not TOGETHER), complaining about lib life and discussing last night’s episode of G shore. Returning to your laptop with a heavy heart you vow to not take such a long break again… 30 minutes later you’re downstairs latte in hand.

Fashion Spotting

The Robbo is for sure the best place in Newcastle to admire the sheer diversity of student style… or not as the case may be. A fun game to pass the time is to tally up the number of Canada goose jackets, Adidas superstars and Ralph Lauren caps you can spot. All the while consciously avoiding the obvious fact there are at least three other people on your floor rocking a very similar outfit to your own.

Water Trips

How many trips to the water fountain do you actually need to make in one day? Not as many as you’re making, that’s for sure. At this rate, the amount of water that you’ve drunk could probably replenish every forest in Africa. It’s a surprise there hasn’t already been a Robbo drought really. Offering to fill up your lib squad’s water bottles may make you look like a Good Samaritan but even they know that you’re really going over there so you can get a cheeky glimpse of your ONS who’s sat nearby.

Anyone for a refill?


What better way to avoid revision then by complaining about revising? For every two hours spent in working at least one of them has to be filled with heavy sighs and sincere complaints to your friends about the sheer amount of work you have to do. The later into the day/night you get the more panicked and sincere these worries become. Your mum comes to expect tearful phone calls or woebegone texts at 3am explaining how you can longer do uni and are going to carry on from your gap yah and become a nomadic traveller.

Stress levels 10000000


In normal term time you’re strictly a social smoker but as soon as exam season hits you’re smoking more then Thomas Shelby in peaky blinders. That random circle outside the lib is the perfect place for your nicotine fix and rain or shine they’ll always be someone rolling a cig at their desk to accompany you.

Social media

No one can resist the temptation of scrolling all day long, especially when the workload is getting to real. This is all fun and games until a number of dreaded circumstances come to light. A) You forget to put your phone on silent and a snapchat story of a rowdy football crowd is played for the entire library to hear. B) You bitch about your course mate on the wrong group chat (the one they’re admin of) and frantically try to convince them that you meant ‘the other Hannah, you know the one with the fringe… obvs wasn’t talking about you!’ C) You stalked your friend’s ex-girlfriend’s cousin’s sister and scrolled all the way back to 2011 and liked her profile picture… Yeah, you’ve fucked it.

Happy procrastination everyone xoxo