Do you even tongue bro? New app strengthens your tongue for oral sex

Practice makes pleasure with new licking out app


A new app promises to help users hone their cunnilingus skills by licking their phone screen.

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Practice makes Pleasure: The home screen of the website

Practice makes Pleasure: The home screen of the website

It requires no download, and users simply go to lickmyapp.com on their phone and start tonguing away at their screen.

Created by San Francisco boffins at Club Sexy Time, it promises to help men and women ‘Practice to Pleasure’.

There’s a choice of three different games, you can flick a light switch on and off, turn a crank or go freestyle – where you bounce a beach ball.  All done with your tongue.

But just because you’re with your phone, and not your lover, doesn’t mean you can get complacent.  The old saying ‘Don’t be a fool, wrap your tool’ still holds.  Your phone screen is dirtier than the average toilet seat.

The makers recommend using clingfilm, although The Tab found a plastic bag also does the trick.

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Make your own Dental Dam before using!

Make your own Dental Dam before using!

However ladies shouldn’t be jumping for joy just yet.

The best strategy to bounce the beach ball is to randomly stab at the phone screen with your tongue. But, as a sexual strategy this is less successful.

As a man I also had my objections.

Getting good at flicking the light switch on and off didn’t provide enough feedback.  I knew I could flick it 384 times, but I wanted it to scream in pleasure.  To cry out “Oh my fucking God!” or “I’m on the way to orgasm town!”.  I needed validation.  I needed to know that my iPhone was enjoying it.

A similar app to help girls give head is unlikely.  It would be very hard to fit an entire phone in your mouth.

I did it 69 times.  How sexual!

I did it 69 times. How sexual!

This article was originally published on The Tab Newcastle.