All the frustrating things long-suffering politics students will understand

Please stop asking me who I voted for!!!

It’s tough being a politics student – we’re accused of becoming too opinionated after one drink, our brains have become a mush of social policy and international regulations, and worst of all, everyone assumes we’re on a ruthless rampage to become Prime Minister.

But amongst all the assumptions that we’re Tories and the seemingly endless debates (inside and outside of the seminar room), we’re actually just trying to muddle through uni and get a 2:1 just like everyone else. We’re not all like the Bullingdon Club, we swear!!!!!!!1!!

Here are all the tragic things that will be all too familiar if you study politics at uni:

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We’re not all boarding school kids with pushy parents

Granted, some of us are, but that doesn’t make us bad people! Having said that, most of our parents (unfortunately) aren’t millionaires, and there are so many girls on our course that we couldn’t all have gone to Eton.

Studying politics has become way more than the cliché of signet rings and dinner suits than it was in days gone by – the majority of us actually just want to know what’s going on in the world and be able to use our knowledge for good.

And we’re sick of being asked about Brexit

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It’s such a controversial subject that it’s literally impossible not to get into an argument with whoever we talk to about it. Even if we’re agreeing, we somehow still end up furious.

What’s even worse is that we’re supposed to have an expert opinion on Brexit, so there’s no chance of ducking out of the debate by claiming ignorance. But if everyone, including MPs and the media, is confused about what’s supposed to be going on in Brussels, then how are us mere students meant to have a clue?

Our entire lives don’t revolve around politics, weirdly

Politics students who are real-life members of the Communist Society, walking around with a copy of Lenin’s Imperialism tucked under their arm, and a hammer and sickle badge on their beret are, funnily enough, pretty rare.

You’ll most likely find the rest of us in our gym gear – as if we ever go – or just regular jeans and a jumper. We’d be almost indistinguishable from regular students, if it weren’t for the huge bags under our eyes. Just because we’re interested in politics, doesn’t mean we’re totally obsessed with it.

Even if you didn’t study a finance-related degree, as long as you’re hard-working and have a strong work ethic, J.P. Morgan are looking for people like you – apply here

Seminar reading is a modern form of torture

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Ironic really, considering Politics tutors should know all about the laws behind war crimes. The case studies, the journals, the biographies, the regulations, the handbooks, the books, the accounts, the reports, etc. etc. etc. etc. are absolutely endless. We can physically feel the information we have to take in squashing our brains against the inside of our skulls. Surely this shouldn’t be allowed by the UN?

No, we don’t want to be the Prime Minister

We just want to understand what she’s up to, and what it means for our future. If the news is anything to go by, being the PM does not look like a lot of fun. Hard pass on that one, thanks.

And we don’t ruin every pres or party by being overly-opinionated and argumentative

Obviously, if you start trying to needle us by making stupid comments, we’re going to respond.

But let’s kill this stereotype that politics students are awful dinner party guests who can’t help but screech at you over their craft ale about how you’re all WRONG about Corbynism and shouldn’t be allowed the vote with your ignorant opinions. That literally never happens. If someone does that it isn’t because they study Politics – it’s because they’re the worst.

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Our professors are sly dogs who insist on using their own work for course material

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It’s no secret that our lecturers design modules so that the entirety of their research and written work are core texts, and are essential if you want to be in with a chance of passing. 

Some call it sticking to what you know, we call it a deceptive ploy to boost book sales. 

Doing all the work for the entirety of a group project is a familiar feeling

Group projects are the worst part of any degree, it can’t be denied. But there’s nothing as painful as having to use the diplomacy we’ve been taught so much about to grit our teeth and refrain from telling the tutor that our lazy coursemate didn’t even turn up to one session, or contribute a single word to the Powerpoint. 

Their candidate number may be on the slides, but you know that 2:1 is the result of your blood, sweat and tears, not them just claiming they watched Question Time for “research” instead of actually going to the library and doing some work for a change. Marx would be having absolutely none of this.

Whatever your degree, J.P. Morgan want to hire grads and interns who are interested in finance – check out their Spring Into Finance for Non-Finance programme here 

The library becomes our entire social lives

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What else can we expect when there’s more reading to do than books in the library? At least we’re all in it together with our coursemates – we definitely need the moral support when we’re trying to wrap our exhausted brains around contemporary political philosophy in Cambodia.

We’ve got the skills and knowledge that no other course can deliver

By studying the ways a variety of countries are run, we get a massive insight into cultures, lifestyles and governments all over the world – that’s a horizon-broadening well of knowledge that you just don’t get from Business Studies.

Plus, for those of us (which is 99 per cent of us) who don’t want to end up in Westminster, we’re now super employable – our stamina, time-management and analytical abilities are out of this world – come at us The Times Top 100.

J.P. Morgan are looking for a variety of talented, driven and analytical grads and students to join them

You don’t have to have a finance-related degree, just a great work ethic and the passion to succeed

Apply for J.P. Morgan’s wide variety of grad schemes and internship opportunities here