I asked out my library crush, and it didn’t go well

I’ll just go crawl in bed and cry now.

If you’re in college, odds are a few of these things apply to you:

You study in a library.  You‘ve seen an attractive individual there. You then return to the library frequently in hopes of seeing that special someone.  You never build up the courage to ask them out. Yet, you talk about the person constantly to your friends, giving them the nickname of ‘library crush’.

Very few people are ballsy enough to approach a stranger and give them their number or ask them out. Especially in a crowded library where people are studying, sober, and quite possibly surrounded by friends. I was one of the rare ones who built up the courage to ask out my library crush. I immediately regretted this decision within a few short seconds.

Here is my true, untold story.

This story unfolded at my previous university, the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee. See, I was so embarrassed I had to transfer to a different institution.

Kidding, but not really. You’ll see why.

Milwaukee is unlike Madison when it comes to libraries, since there is only one. The Golda Meir Library is in the center of campus and houses every student looking for a place to study. Like many, I had my spot, the one area I went every time I walked through the doors. However, that particular day I was feeling ambitious and didn’t have much work to complete.  I thought, ‘may as well switch it up and try the first floor.’

The first floor was wonderful, people funneling in and out constantly, conversations going on throughout the floor, and most importantly? Females. So I like to glance at attractive females, sue me.  I promise I’m not the only one.

Anyway, I was sitting at my table typing away on my computer when a group of girls walked in and sat down a few tables away. For some reason, they must have thought the library was a place to be as loud as possible and they ignored the concept of common courtesy. I immediately tried blocking out these girls, since I prefer my eardrums in tact. I ignored them for about 30 minutes before their friend walked in.

I think a gallon of drool accumulated at my feet from the time she walked in to the time she sat down. Unfortunately, I had class shortly after she arrived so I had to leave, but I vowed to come back to the same spot the rest of the semester just to see her. A few more ‘library crush’ sightings occurred before Judgment Day.

It was an afternoon in early November.  I had a break and I wanted to get some work done. Naturally, I headed to the library and to my spot. It only took about an hour before she walked in. This was it. I gave up all hope of getting anything accomplished and immediately started thinking about how I would go about this. Just as I was about to make a move, two of her friends sat down and I was back to square one.

Maybe 20 minutes later, the courage was back.  It was time for me to head to the gym and I knew it was now or never. I wrote my number down on a piece of paper with a small note on the backside, handed it to her, and babbled some stupid line that I thought sounded smooth. What happened next probably took about 13 seconds, but it felt like a year.

This girl looked me in my eyes and smiled.  She then held up the slip of paper, and ripped it into shreds.

It wasn’t one or two tears. No, she basically shoved my number into a paper shredder, gathered the pieces, and shoved them back into the paper shredder. I was dumbfounded.

With a red face, I flung my backpack on both shoulders and walked out. How can one person be so cruel?

After two months of admiring from afar and finally building up the courage, I was shot down in a matter of seconds. This girl was so beautiful.  Sure, she may or may not be a horrible, black-hearted individual, but that day she certainly was. Maybe it was my baby face. Maybe it was my Tigers shirt and she was a White Sox fan. Who knows? All I know is I held off playing any Sam Smith for the next month to give my tear ducts a break.

Now you may think the story is over. Not quite. I took a spring break trip last year, heading down to Florida with my friend and his family. As I was sitting in the Chicago airport waiting at my gate, a girl came and sat a few seats away. She was beautiful…and I swore I recognized her.

I immediately started thinking ‘what if she is the seat next to me? Do I talk to her?’ You know, typical nervous guy stuff. Turns out, she wasn’t the seat next to me, she was maybe 15 rows up. The flight landed in Fort Myers, people exited the plane, and we were all walking to our separate gates. We both got on the escalator, and that’s when it hit me.

‘Holy shit. That’s the girl who ripped my number up.’

I was in shock. What were the odds? We exited the same door, I made sure not to thank her for holding the door for me. She got in her ride, I got in mine, and we went our separate ways.

And that’s it. Maybe one day I’ll run into Library Girl again and things will go differently. For now, I’m working on finding the next beautiful, studious soul to take my chances with.