How do I balance my high maintenance mentality with wanting people to think I’m chill

The beginning of adulthood can be hard, and sometimes you have burning questions you don’t want to ask anyone. Everything from how to balance a long distance relationship to wanting to chill out a little bit to the sex questions you are too afraid to ask your friends. We are here to help answer your questions, and offer some guidance.

How do I balance my high maintenance mentality with wanting people to think I’m chill?

Honestly, this is a hard question to answer, but I do want to start off by saying that having a high maintenance mentality is NOT always a bad thing. I think in today’s day and age, sometimes people who are high maintenance are seen as different in a negative way and that’s not how it should be.

Having a high maintenance mentality has good things about it like, you always look good and you’re always prepared for anything. You find yourself being detailed oriented, you have a separate routine, you’re always on the ball and you’re very determined, so you go after what you want.

With that being said, I think that the best way to chill out a little is to not be afraid to go outside of your comfort zone. Don’t feel uncomfortable leaving your high strung personality behind for a night. You never know what could happen when you let your guard down for a little!

The first step is just having an open mind. Don’t shut things down, because they aren’t the way you think they should be, but rather embrace new ideas.

Another step is not to be afraid to crack some jokes and lighten the mood! Everyone loves good jokes. Don’t start talking about school and business while trying to enjoy a night out.

Lastly, try and let loose and  just HAVE FUN. Take a deep breath and let yourself laugh and do stupid things because that’s what college students are meant to do.

Obviously there are times when a high maintenance mentality is a blessing, but sometimes it’s feel like it’s good to ditch the mentality, scream yolo into the wind, and let things happen that are out of your control.

high maintenance means looking hella fine all the time

What’s the number one strategy for maintaining a long distance relationship?

First off, I think there are a lot of strategies for maintaining a long distance relationship if you really want to make it work. Second off, relationships will be hard whether you’re two miles or 2000 miles away from each other.

It’s all about wanting to make it work and actually putting in the effort which means each person has to meet the other halfway.  I mean, ladies and gentlemen we’re talking about relationships here.

No relationship is easy breezy, but one thing that can make relationships easier is communication. If you two ain’t talking, you two ain’t working. You have to be able to talk about anything and everything.

For example, you see your girlfriend’s snap story and she is with a guy in it. You feel a pang of jealousy and are concerned. Don’t bottle up that anger and be passive aggressive. Be straight up, and talk about how you’re feeling.

You can’t be uncomfortable confronting your significant other about things that he or she does that bother you. There comes a point in a relationship in which you have to learn to trust your partner and be able to communicate your thoughts and feelings to them no matter what they are. Sometimes it can be hard to communicate, but it’s all about taking a leap of faith and saying what is on your mind, otherwise it just won’t work.

Being far away from each other can be very hard and after a while, it can start to take a toll on you. One tip to keeping the love alive in your relationship while being so far apart would be to Skype and Facetime when possible! Talk about life, laugh about past memories, and reconnect as much as possible. If you’re really feeling up to it, have a date over Skype! Make dinner and eat with them via the computer screen, and act like it’s a real date.

Another idea is to try doing nice little things- and this goes for guys AND girls. Guys- send your girl flowers or chocolates unexpectedly with a sweet note attached. Girls- send your guy those Lakers tickets he’s been wanting for months, and tell him to bring one of his bros with him.

Even a simple text during the day saying how much you care and miss the other person can go a long way, so never underestimate the power of cute texts (especially to girls).

One big thing is to always show them how much you care about the other person. The reassurance is incredibly helpful when there is so much physical distance between you.

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