It’s official: VT men may be the least romantic humans on earth

When he buys you $3 Long Islands at Sharkey’s during happy hour and acts like he’s balling out…

College is like the universal hub for hook-ups and bad decisions. Attending one pretty much guarantees you running into at least 10 fuckboys in your first year. And while a lot of the Virginia Tech male population likes to think they’re better than everyone, they are, in fact, no better than the common jerks we dealt with in high school. By the time you finish your first year, you will probably have more screenshots of fucketry in your phone than you have selfies.

You may be lucky and run into some genuinely nice guys (please point us in their direction) but if you’re like most of us, you’ll run into an exciting variety of fuckboy behaviors like the ones below.

Thinks drinks at TOTS is a romantic date.

Nice to meet you too

Or thinks that Benny’s at 4am is a date.

Assumes being blunt will make him irresistible.

How about no?

Takes Tinder a little too seriously, not knowing it’s mostly used as an ego booster around here.

Chill, dude

Buys you $3 Long Islands at Sharkey’s during happy hour and acts like he’s balling out.

Comes back to you after his other hookups didn’t work out.

Beware the “hey stranger” texts

Thinks that watching him play basketball at War is your idea of a date.

Does wayyyy too much on Tinder thinking it makes him endearing.

What even are you? Who would swipe right on you?

Takes you on a “date” to West End but makes you swipe for him.

Thinks it’s okay to leave you at the date party alone.

That’s just rude

Thinks day drinking and power houring with his sleazy friends is enough to make you fall for him.

Has the inability to take a hint in the DMs.


Tells all his frat brothers you hooked up and now they’re all pursuing you too.

Is just ~certain~ that you clearly must want to be with him because he wants you.

LOL, you thought so

Invites you to hike the Cascades and walks ahead of you with his friends you didn’t know were coming the whole time.

Is unable to take ‘no’ for an answer.

I have enough friends

Assumes because he’s an athlete you automatically want him.

Thinks that ‘hey’ somehow means something more sexual.

That escalated WAY too quickly

Suggests you get an Uber home even though he picked you up in his car.

And says he’ll Venmo the cost of your Uber but never does.

Ladies and gentlemen beware the Virginia Tech fuckboys and when you do run into one, stand your ground. Good luck out there, you may need it.

Virginia Tech