Branscomb is the absolute worst dorm on campus
Housing is upon us, and this is one place you don’t want to get stuck living
Its housing time, meaning everyone was super excited to see if they got into Kissam. Too bad most of you didn’t.
But don’t worry, there are plenty of other places to choose from like Towers, Blakemore, the Chaffins and Morgan & Lewis.
There’s one place you seriously don’t want to get stuck, and that’s Branscomb. I’m lucky enough to live there now, and let’s just say it’s not the best of places.
It’s ancient
Branscomb is one of the oldest residence halls having been built in 1962, and honestly looks like it hasn’t been updated since.
If you have the grand opportunity to live in Stapleton you have to walk outside to get to your room. Even when its freezing. Housing does not want you to walk through their office, they want you to get hypothermia.
I live in Stapleton, btw.
So. Many. Stairs.
If you do not have the luxury of living in Lupton, you will not have an elevator.
Hopefully you won’t live on the third floor like I do. My dad had to drag all of my stuff up three flights of stairs during move-in, and I anticipate moving out will be just as fun.
It’s full of sorority girls
No offense to them, but they aren’t the quietest group on campus. Especially when 10 girls in the same sorority are on your floor.
Nothing sticks to the walls
I’ve tried to attach posters many times yet they always end up falling.
Half of the posters I put up at the beginning of the year are now stuck behind my bed.
The basement is super sketchy
It is really creepy looking and there is always some weird sound going on.
You will also see the random dead bug as you drag your laundry through the halls.
The laundry room is always wet
Not only do you have to get to it by walking through the super sketchy basement, there’s also always water on the floor from a flooded washer.
There’s usually a chance the dryers won’t work and you won’t find out until after you’ve paid and waited an hour, only to discover your clothes are still soaking wet.
The dorm rooms are tiny
I thought having a corner room meant my room would be bigger but I was wrong.
They squished a room in between the two corner rooms and now my double room is smaller than a single in Kissam.
It’s right across from frat row
Meaning you can hear the frat boys and their sick beats all year long.
Frat parties are fun but its not the greatest when you are trying to get that paper in by midnight and you cannot focus because of the music.
The bathrooms are gross
You can’t go a full weekend without someone upchucking their Thirsty Thursday all over the stalls.
The sinks get clogged at the beginning of the year and they never work correctly after, and some of the stalls don’t even have locks on them. It’s the greatest.
This isn’t actually in Branscomb but it could be. Gross.
While Branscomb is not the best place to live, it does have a few upsides.
It has a 24 hour Munchie, is close to most classes, and its a great place to live when you want to be first in line for the football or basketball game to get the free t-shirts.
So if you do get stuck living there, don’t despair. Branscomb may not be your first choice but you will still have a lot of fun.