The day UVA became my second family
Her next four words changed my life forever: ‘Your father has died’
It was my second full day at UVA. I had been up until three in the morning the night before, and I was exhausted but starting to feel like I was at home. The night before had been filled with a rap concert, my first college party, and then finally crashing back at the dorm talking to my hall mates.
I was walking with my roommate to get coffee because I’m an addict, and after that we were going to pick up some textbooks. That’s when I got the text from my mom: ‘I’m here’. I was surprised. She wasn’t able to move me in, so my dad had taken me with the promise that my mom would come and visit me in a few weeks. So I told my roommate I would catch up with her later, and walked back to my dorm. When I saw her I knew something was wrong. So I asked her, and her next four words changed my life forever: “Your father has died.” I remember thinking: this isn’t real, this isn’t my life, I can’t leave I just got here.
A sound filled with such agony and despair filled the air and it took me a second to realize it was coming from my mouth. My legs gave way and the next thing I realized was that I was on the carpet, and that I probably should have vacuumed it.
In a rush I packed one bag, grabbed my pillow and blanket, and shoved myself in the back of an SUV for a five hour ride amid torrential rain.
The next few days were agonizing, but the overwhelming love and support from friends, family, and my new UVA friends were amazing.
My RA took care of notifying my professors, my hallmates reached out and sent condolences, and the Association Deans made sure my transition back to UVA would be seamless.
Almost two weeks later, I was in the back of the same SUV headed back to Grounds. The first day started out rough, I felt like I was out of the loop, I didn’t have a routine and didn’t know anyone besides my hallmates.
But every time I felt overwhelmed, something would happen to calm me down and make me feel at home. Late nights watching Stranger Things on Netflix (a show I highly recommend), ice cream with friends or the home football game gave me a community and I began to feel like I had a second home.
Healing is a process, and it takes time. But I know that with my amazing UVA community around me, I can make it.