Keeping your promises: This is the importance of intentionality in college

Recently I’ve realized how important something called intentionality is. Before college, I didn’t even know what this meant. I knew what the word meant, but I didn’t know why people kept talking about it so much as it relates to friendship.

I’ve created my own definition of the word through practice and observation. Being intentional means doing something with purpose, specifically, and for a reason.

That being said, I’d like to focus on three areas that we can be intentional in our lives: our words, our actions and our time.

My friend Brooke and me looking crusty at 7am before cheering on runners at the Chick-fil-A Half Marathon.

Our words

To begin, it’s easy to say that we’ll get lunch with an old friend in the midst of a busy schedule or easy to say that we’ll pick up an extra slide for the group presentation that isn’t going well. But it isn’t always easy to follow through, and it really means nothing if we don’t.

It’s easy to say we should respect others, feed the hungry and care for the sick, but it means nothing if we aren’t putting these words to practice.

I used the first two examples because they are both things I’ve failed at. The first is huge for me. It’s so incredibly easy to tell a friend we’ll “talk later” or “get lunch soon.”  I do this all the time – whether it’s on my way to class, in the dreaded MLC, or in the lobby of my dorm. I make a lot of promises.

The difference between first semester me and second semester me is that I no longer make promises I cannot keep. When I say we’ll get lunch, I’ll be the first to text you. When I say I can help you on Statistics homework, I do. I no longer make empty promises, because I know how much they hurt.

Our actions

The next one is harder. In our actions, we should really only be doing things we would be proud of doing in front of our moms. (This idea scares me a lot, but it reminds me how much I need to work on it.) Whether we know it or not, someone is always watching.

It could be a friend, a professor, or our next job interviewer. Am I presenting myself in a way I am proud of?  Do my actions speak to who I am as a person, or would I be ashamed to have my actions on display?

Brooke is the most intentional person I know.

Our time

Last but not least, it’s important to be intentional with our time. This one’s new to me. Why does it matter how I spend my time?  Isn’t it my life? Yes, but…

What I’ve realized is that how someone spends his or her time is a big indicator of character. Do I spend my time studying when I need to? Do I go out during the school week? What about serving others? Do I watch Netflix for hours when more productive opportunities are calling?

I’m not saying leisure is bad – I’m not saying that at all. What I am saying is there is a balance, and that balance looks different for everyone. Some of us need that extra hour of sleep in the afternoon, an extra show of Parks and Recreation, or an extra hour at Bolton with our friends. (I know I do.) And we’re allowed to have it.

It’s more about a balance – a balance that allows us to be the best version of ourselves and a balance that empowers others to do the same. Today, it is my hope that you may find yours.