Hilarious 1993 mail exchange discovered between Pi Phi and Phi Tau at UC Berkeley
‘I am referring to the flagrant exposure of your members’ vulgar manhood’
Total Frat Move was recently sent two pieces of correspondence between Pi Beta Phi sorority and Phi Kappa Tau fraternity at UC Berkeley from 1993. They were discovered in Phi Tau’s archives, discussing a particularly intriguing issue between the houses involving “vulgar manhood” that had gotten out of hand.
In one word: penises.
If that isn’t exciting enough, Total Sorority Move made the connection that Nicolle Devinish, author of the first letter, is very likely none other than Nicolle Wallace, an American author, former co-host of The View, and former White House director of Communications. Her maiden name, Devenish, was changed to Wallace when she got married in 2005, and she graduated with a degree in mass communications from UC Berkeley in 1994.
The letter is written on official Pi Phi stationery, to a Phi Tau brother named Rod.
Nicolle, presumably the president or other chapter official of Pi Phi, begins by telling Rod that she has received numerous complaints from sisters whose rooms face Phi Tau’s house about the “flagrant exposure of [their] members vulgar manhood.”
Nicolle then adds a well-executed dick joke: “Although this problem has been a long and hard one to swallow with our Chi Psi neighbors, it seems that it will be much shorter on your end.”
She implores Rod to give her a call so that they may resolve the issue and “keep up [their] houses relationship.”
But the response from Phi Tau shows another side to the story.
The author of this letter first acknowledges the issue at hand, saying “We understand full well the fright — and excitement — you must feel after viewing the sheer size of our ‘vulgar manhood,’ a distinction in which we take just pride.”
He then contends that Pi Phi sisters have been taking part in the frivolity, too. From scaling “three floors of sheer stucco to leave marks of their undying affection” in the form of lipstick kisses on Phi Tau’s windows, to “sunbathing activity on the balcony on the south side of your house … coupled with the fact that none of the twenty-seven women on that balcony wore a shred of clothing,” this Phi Tau brother asserts that “the entire population of Pi Beta Phi would like nothing better than to fuck us dry.”
Today, Pi Phi and Phi Tau still live in apparent harmony on Piedmont Avenue.