I once wrote a 10-page paper in 4 hours
Please don’t tell my mother
They say you can’t live off of hot cheetos for a week while studying for finals. They also say you can’t write term papers in the last few hours before it’s due. “They” say a lot of things. I do not tend to listen. I have done both of those things (once simultaneously; causes heartburn, steer clear) and lived to tell the tale. This is my story.
You know the feeling: crunch time is here, the bCourses website one of the looming tabs on your browser waiting to accept that last minute submission (unless of course, you’re supernatural and you submitted it early; this article is not for you). If you’ve done it before you remember the sweaty palms, the frantic checks for confirmation of submission, the short-lived burst of adrenaline from submitting something SO important to your final grade SO last minute.
It can be nerve-wracking to leave things to the last minute, but it can also be beneficial. Some of my best writing has come from the stressed last minute reflection I hastily type at a last ditch attempt for an A. Here are some of my best tips for the so called “stress write.”
Head somewhere without human contact
This one is probably the most important. I may be more talkative than your Aunt Sally after three glasses of wine, sober, but this applies to everyone. Even the quietest of college students will find a way to make conversation when all they should really be doing is finishing their assignment.
Distractions are most… distracting when you have a million things due. And don’t even think about skipping this one; without it, all the others are meaningless.
proof of life before entering the abyss
Set yourself up with snacks and beverages
So you’re all settled in a place that hasn’t seen life since the dinosaurs, but ten minutes in you get hungry. And then ten minutes later your mouth feels like the sahara. Snacks and drinks are crucial to combat this.
The less you have to disrupt your temporary cave of writing, the better. Hot cheetos are always a good idea.
My snack of choice
Give yourself a soundtrack
Some people like mind numbing EDM, others Clair-de-lune on a ten hour loop. I don’t care what you choose, but I highly recommend it has no words in it. If your objective is to get as many words on a page as you can that actually make sense together, you need less words entering your subconscious. It’s science, or something.
pretending that Zayn is actually keeping me company
Stay away from time suckers
God once said something like, “avoiding Facebook for more than an hour at a time gets you into heaven automatically.” I’m paraphrasing, but you get the gist. It’s important to stay as far away from mind numbing social media as possible, but it’s also important to let your brain rest periodically.
If you don’t give it a chance to vegetate over Facebook, it will burn out well before your deadline rolls around. No one wants that.
Ha Ha Ha
If you follow the steps above, religiously, you’ll finish that essay on time. Lord knows I’ve done it more times than I’d like to tell my mom! And when all else fails:
The Google search for success
Happy writing y’all!