The seven types of people you’ll find in your lecture halls
Which one are you?
Among the crowds of students in each of our lecture halls, we encounter both the best and worst types of people.
When there’s 300 of you all sat in the same amphitheater, from all walks of life, you may think you’re united only by your shared boredom of the old guy at the front.
But we know better. Everyone in a lecture theater fits into one of seven categories. Which one are you?
The student who sits in the aisle seat when the rest of the row is empty;
If you’re getting to class early, or even on time, everybody coming in after you would appreciate if you would scoot your boot down a few seats. No? Alright, but don’t complain when everybody’s asses and large backpacks are in your face when they try to squeeze by.
Is it too much to ask for common courtesy in college? Oh wait, it actually might be.
The guy who grunts every time the name Donald Trump is mentioned
We get it! While some try to tune out his name at all costs, it’s inevitable that the name will come up in class while discussing current events, no matter what the class subject is.
I encountered this a lot last year in my Journalism & Society lecture hall. In a room filled with mostly freshmen, I’d hear frequent grunting and complaining while discussing news of the upcoming 2016 presidential election. However, this was complete irony due to the fact that these students were sitting in a journalism class preparing for careers as objective communicators…
The person who walks by and smells INCREDIBLE
Don’t deny it, there’s totally been a person in class who made you question what you smell like. And let’s face it, we’ve all been there: running late for the first class of the day, hoping that your deodorant and body spray will cover up the fact that you haven’t showered in four days.
Now you’re sitting in class desperately trying to sneak a quick sniff of yourself, and all you hope for is that you don’t have to get up and pass anyone until class is over. And at that point, you’ll be speed walking toward the doors and all the way back home to shower.
The girl who answers questions so quietly nobody can hear her
You know her. It’s that girl who’s sitting all the way in the back of the room, and nobody can hear a word she says. When the professor asks her to repeat herself, she answers again, but only like 0.02 percent louder.
The student that gives their opinion on everything the professor says
Even in a lecture hall of 100+ people, this student still feels the need to give their input on seemingly everything the professor says…without raising their hand. It seems as if this student thinks it’s only them and the professor in the room. Half the time this student can be intelligent and funny, but the other half of the time they come off as arrogant, disruptive, ass-kissing know-it-alls. I guess it all depends on the luck of the draw.
The kid who starts packing his bag 20 minutes before class is over
This student kicks off the chain reaction of noisy shuffling and zipping while class is still fully in session, and then proceeds to sprint out the door as soon as class is dismissed.
Would I be lying if I said I haven’t ever been this person? Yep.
The girl sitting in front of you using iMessage on her laptop
I hope you know we’re reading. We’re all reading. Sometimes we actually become quite invested, and when class ends, we’re left with many lingering questions.
Will Christina be down to go Pi Lam tonight? Is Jordan hosting the pregame? Why is Taylor mad at Marissa? To be continued…
Illustrations done by Nate Rogers for The Tab Temple