The official Hillary v. Bernie debate drinking game
Drink every time Bernie says ‘bill-yuh-nayes’
Yesterday it became official Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders, the top contending democratic presidential candidates, will debate in New Hampshire on Thursday, February 4th.
“That’s fine. I love debates,” Bernie said on MSNBC’s Morning Joe, suggesting Clinton’s perilously close lead over Sanders in the Iowa Caucus was the reason for her sudden eagerness to debate.
The debate will air on MSNBC at 9pm tonight and will be moderated by Rachel Maddow from MSNBC and Chuck Todd from NBC News.
To celebrate another opportunity to watch politicians go at it, we created the perfect drinking game for the debate.
So turn on your TV, select some moderately priced alcohol suitable for everyday Americans, and in accordance with Sanders’ democratic socialist views, share it with some friends.
These are the rules:
- Cheers your friends and drink when one candidate announces the respect he or she has for the other. Be thankful we’re still in the primaries, where civility still reigns.
- When a candidate goes over the allotted speaking time, chug for as long as it takes for the moderator to regain control.
- At any mention of Trump, groan, worry for the fate of our country, and take a swig.
- When Hillary does that nervous, wide-mouthed laugh, drink until she stops laughing.
- Take a sip every time Bernie says “billionaires” (bill-yuh-nayes).
- Drink if Hillary calls herself a progressive.
- Drink if Hillary calls herself a moderate.
- Drink when Hillary mentions her record of “getting things done.”
- If Bernie mentions free higher education, try to calculate how much in student debt you’ll owe by the time you graduate. Then drink whatever amount you feel is appropriate to cope with that reality.
- When Bernie starts yelling, waving his arms, and calling for a political revolution, take a long, patriotic swig and tweet how you’re #FeelingTheBern.
- Take a swig when Hillary says we need a woman in the white house. Finish your drink if she mentions being a grandmother. Think about how much more entertaining this debate would be if there were some republicans.
- Take a long swig when Bernie inevitably calls out Hillary for taking corporate money and being “part of the establishment.”
- Drink if Bernie says “Wall Street will hate me.”
- Drink if Hillary brags about how much Republicans hate her.
- When Bernie claims Democrats win when there’s a high voter turnout, text your mom and ask her how to register to vote.