Meet the SU students in long-distance relationships

College is often seen as a time for experimenting and discovering who you are. Now more than ever, hookup culture dominates college campuses, with many students going out on weekends with the intention to bring a stranger home for the night. Relationships are viewed as a burden and many students trade in a full time partner for one night stands.

However, this stereotype does not apply to everyone. Some college students have decided to take the plunge with their significant others and continue their relationships long-distance. While advancements in technology have made it easier for these couples, FaceTime and texting are no replacement for face-to-face communication.

These four SU couples will be reuniting with their loves this Thanksgiving break. They shared what it’s been like for them navigating long distance relationships.

Ellisa and Victor

How long have you been dating?

Almost two years.

What’s the hardest thing about being apart?

Not being able to be there for big and small moments. Communication can be off sometimes, too.

Did anyone oppose your decision to continue dating?

No one has ever told us not to date or discouraged us from dating but there are those people who say they wouldn’t be able to do it themselves.

Are there any upsides to being apart?

Seeing each other after not seeing each other for a while, and the phone calls and FaceTime dates. Your emotional relationship also gets stronger since there’s not much of a psychical relationship anymore.

Is there any advice you’d like to share with other couples?

Communication is key, trust is everything. Tell your significant other little details about your day and make them feel like they’re not missing everything, it goes a long way.

Sam and Erica

How long have you been dating? 

10 months.

What’s the hardest thing about being apart?

I would say the hardest part about being apart is not seeing her every day. Even though we talk all the time, hanging out in person is obviously a lot more fun and connecting. We used to hang out every day last year so it’s a big difference.

Did anyone oppose your decision to continue dating?

Yeah, some friends and older relatives would try to convince me that it was a bad idea and I would be better off trying to meet new girls in college. But I ignored most of them because it’s very different for someone who was single going into college compared to someone who is currently in a relationship, so most of them couldn’t really relate.

Are there any upsides to being apart?

The upsides of being long distance are that when you see your significant other after what was likely a long period of time, it’s more special. Not that hanging out when you can see them every day isn’t special, but distance makes it even more special.

I think it also makes you trust each other a lot more and have patience because you have to understand their daily schedule isn’t the same as yours at all. Overall, I’ve found it to be tough but rewarding.

Is there any advice you’d like to share with other couples?

My advice would be that you know what you want, and that’s what you should do.

Ignore the haters and anything that tells you otherwise of what you wanna do. Conventional wisdom and rumors and stuff may tell you that long distance ruins relationships, but that’s not true because you can make it work if you want to.

I couldn’t imagine being without my girlfriend because she’s my best friend, so I knew that staying together was definitely the right move, and I have no regrets whatsoever.

Sam and Brian

How long have you been dating?

Almost six months.

What’s the hardest thing about being apart?

Not knowing what the other person is doing. Being apart requires a shit ton of trust that the other will be faithful.

Did anyone oppose your decision to continue dating?

A ton of pushback for me because all my friends and even my mom told me it was my freshman year of college, I should be single and it would make life much easier for me. Not so much for Brian because he was a sophomore.

Are there any upsides to being apart?

It’s more exciting when you see the other person and it really tests a relationship. You figure out how much the other really loves you and how much you love your partner.

Is there any advice you’d like to share with other couples?

If you don’t really love the person and don’t see a future don’t do it. It’s really hard, but if you don’t trust your partner and if they give you any reason for doubt, end it because it’s not worth being paranoid 24/7.

Distance has the power to destroy a relationship or make it unbreakable.

Josh and Alanna

How long have you been dating?

Three and a half years.

What’s the hardest thing about being apart? 

The hardest thing about being apart from each other is probably the fact that we went to the same high school and lived less than three minutes away by car. We saw each other every single day for four years and now we don’t have that face time and accessibility.

We have to text, talk on the phone, and video chat to be able to communicate, and it’s an adjustment.

Did anyone oppose your decision to continue dating?

We’ve been together so long and the fact that we’re best friends and have survived some tough things in each other’s lives means that nobody is really against us staying together I don’t think, at least I’d hope not!

Unless she has some sort of suitor at St. Joe’s. I know my parents approved but they wanted to make sure that I didn’t spend all my time talking to her that we each got a good college experience and focused on school, but there’s been nobody to tell us not to do it really.

Are there any upsides to being apart? 

The upsides of staying together might seem small in number but they carry a great weight.

Part of it is sort of like a connection to home, so we’re not 100% socially made up of people from our school, but it’s also having someone who’s going through the same thing as you and someone who you can talk to who knows you well and isn’t a friend of only a couple months. It’s nice to have that person you can talk to about anything.

Another upside is that we’re in love and we care for each other so we can see each other succeed and help each other through any rough patches. Staying together really was a decision for us, and should be for anyone who is considering it, about if that person will be able to continue to make you happy.

Is there any advice you’d like to share with other couples? 

My advice to anyone who’s not sure whether they should stay together is just ponder if you both are ready to trust the other person around strangers and know they’ll make good decisions.

Ask if you can trust yourself in that respect as well. If that other person makes you happy and you’re confident if your relationship and you’re both on the same page after long talks and agreements, definitely go for it.