Lianna Holston: You’re more than the likes on your Facebook post

Alright troops.

Week 7. For many of you, it has maybe been a bitch of a week, what with midterms, papers, and Valentine’s Day making you want to say “fuck you” to the world.

THUS the time has come for a more ~serious~ morale boost, instead of the usual (does two posts count as usual?) (I guess the previous 40 emails ((shoutout to the true fans who’ve been there since day one)) do) thought dump about the cute men and silly antics that abound here at Leland Stanford Junior University. (Seriously though have you seen the men’s soccer team bc wow.)

If you don’t have time in your life right now for the ramblings of a stranger/friend/potential love interest [suggestive face emoji], I fully understand. Feel free to Google Jesper the Snow Cat and continue on with your day.

Wow that picture is /a lot/ grainier than expected. Sry.

HEY.

Social media. Let’s talk about it. Or rather, I’ll type about it and you’ll read it. Whatever.

A friend from high school once texted me last year asking how I was doing, but before I could respond they sent another text saying “you seem amazing, according to Facebook!” So then I replied “I’m great!!” because I felt obligated to.

Social media has crafted these convoluted windows into each other’s lives that, while great at getting the word out about that Sigma Chi party on Saturday (lol rip), can also be extraordinarily detrimental to our own emotional wellbeing. I can’t tell you how many times an hour I check my phone after posting a Facebook status to see if it’s getting “enough” likes. It’s gotten to the point that if “only” 30 people like a post, I delete it and my mood worsens. What the hell is that about? Thirty people liked something I had to say! That’s more people than would fit in my dorm room (trust me – I’ve tried), and yet in my mind it’s a meaningless number. I let myself believe that my self-worth can be quantified based off how many thumbs up people give a thought that popped into my head. And I know I’m not alone in this.

What heightens that feeling more is comparing ourselves to others on social media. I have friends who regularly get upwards of 300 likes on their profile pictures. I wouldn’t even be able to name 300 people if you asked me to. (I mean like I could eventually but not off the top of my head. Jeez.) Someone once pointed out that “we see everyone else’s highlight reels and compare them to our own behind the scenes.” What I’m saying is: the stuff we see on the screens we stare at all day long (like this one) (ironic?) is pretty arbitrary. No one is actually as beautiful/successful/happy/tan as they constantly appear to be on Facebook. And the number of people who like that picture of your face is in no way a reflection of your goodness or your value as a human being. Don’t let your self worth be reduced to a petty number. There’s so much more to you than that.

Fuck this typewriter

I’m not pretending that this can happen overnight. Letting go of this craving for likes is not an easy task. Only recently did I really pause to take a look at how much I rely on social media for validation. And, honestly, the answer scared me. The extent to which I let my social media presence dictate my mood for the hour, day, or sometimes even the week was is (I’m a work in progress) alarming. I’d delete posts if they weren’t getting at least two likes per minute, and be grumpy for the rest of the day. Especially if that cute Signu didn’t toss the post a like. It was absurd. ABSURD.

I don’t think there’s an easy solution to this. But I do think that there’s a hell of a lot more to live for than the approval of your Instagram followers. Celebrate who you know you are, not who the world perceives you to be based off what you put out there on the Internet. Life’s too short to sit around waiting for other people to tell you you’re worth it.

Take some time to rejoice in the beauty that surrounds you in the real world. I had some god damn amazing chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast this morning. Everything is going to be ok.

Lianna “the world’s newest and biggest fan of cake served in jars” Holston