I took my cookie decorating to a new level over break

Even though we Northerners have had summer in December, the holiday season is still the time to say goodbye to your summer body, and hello to ugly Christmas sweaters and holiday treats.   To get into the spirit, this year I decided to make my own sugar and gingerbread cookies to decorate.

Since gingerbread and sugar cookies are probably as basic as dessert gets, I figured I had no choice but to decorate them in exciting and culturally relevant ways.

I started out with the essentials:  reindeer, candy cane, tree.

Yes, some have told me my craftsmanship is a mix of Michelangelo and Betty Crocker.

Longing for the beach during this oddly warm winter, I decided to make a Spring Breakers gingerbread lady.

Look for her next year in the Victoria Secret Fashion Show!

I next turned to a reliable source of inspiration: Despicable Me.

With the Minions as my helpers, I felt ready to take on more famous figures, turning next to the biggest names in the news right now: Hilary Clinton and Donald Trump.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the former Secretary of Gingerbread State, and possibly our first female cookie president, Hilary Clinton.  I chose to style Hilary in her classic pant suit, cinched at the waist with a licorice belt.  She also proudly sports her American flag jelly bean pin, and her hair is beautifully styled in yellow candy curls.

Next, is “the Donald,” who requested that I build a cake between him and all the gingerbread cookies.  Don’t forget to watch him on the next presidential debate hosted by CNN (Cookie News National).

Needing someone to interview the candidates, I decided to craft Conan O’Brien.  The cookie cutter was apparently intended to be a dinosaur, but I thought it looked more like the head of Jimmy Neutron or Conan, so I took a risk and tried to make the “ginger” man.

This really doesn’t look like Conan, but more like a mix of 2013 Miley Cyrus and Jesse Tyler Ferguson with Cheeto dust on his face.  Something more like this:

Finally, since I crafted cookies in the likeness of our current leading presidential candidates, I felt obligated to sculpt the presidential family of 2020: President Kanye West, and First Lady Kim Kardashian (also featuring their newborn son, Saint).

Yes, that golden halo is indeed Saint West.

Oh and yes, cookie Kim is fresh off of her PAPER photoshoot…it turned out great.  Here is her ad that really “broke the oven,” as they say.

And that’s the way the cookie crumbled…