Help I’ve fallen and I can’t get up: Penn State edition

We’ve all had those embarrassing, clumsy moments on campus. Maybe we missed the step going down the stairs in Willard or we tripped going up in the HUB. Or maybe we accidentally got in the same compartment as someone in the revolving door at the Library (been there done that).

Nevertheless, it happens. It happens easily to the best of us. Yet there are some occurrences on and off campus that make you want to crawl in a hole and just die. The Tab asked around for some of your most embarrassing wipeout stories.

The ‘ice finally victimized me’ incident

“It was snowing outside and I was walking to the library in the morning, so there were tons of people outside,” said Kate Grubb, a senior majoring in veterinary and biomedical sciences.

“I didn’t see that there was sheet of ice so I completely slipped, fell up into the air, landed on my butt and just sat there completely confused as to what happened. So embarrassing, and my ass hurt so much after that.”

The ‘my friend was actually injured’ episode

“I have slipped many times on ice in the winter or tripped going up the stairs. My one friend actually managed to sprain her ankle on an uneven sidewalk outside Willard,” said freshman Gina N. majoring in bio-behavioral health and French.

The typical “beer spilt in eye, then a tumble and a tackle” occurrence

“I went to a house party this year and the floor was slippery with beer. My friend had somehow managed to spill beer in my eye, so I had to venture to the upstairs bathroom to wash it out. On the way back down, I missed a step and slid down the whole staircase into this one girl, pretty much tackling her to the floor. I immediately left after that,” said Sydni J., a junior majoring in health policy and administration.

The ‘my bike suddenly failed’ event

“I was riding my bike along Pollock, and all of a sudden my brakes failed. As I was trying to fix it, I hit the curb and flew forward onto the grass. Thankfully I wasn’t hurt, but it was super embarrassing,” said junior Tom Cagnetta majoring in marketing.

The ‘terrible tales of red pasta sauce’ fiasco

“Freshman year I was at dinner in Findlay commons. It was chicken parmesan night, so I was walking back towards my table with a bowl full of red sauce and two slabs of chicken. I was so excited to sit down and eat, because it was the one night the food was actually good,” said Kirenjot Singh, a junior majoring in health policy and administration.

“My excitement got the best of me as I missed the wet floor sign and slipped right there in the middle of the commons. My chicken went flying, yet the sauce found its way right onto my shirt. I lost my appetite and my dignity that evening.”

And finally the ‘eye-witness of unfortunate events’ point of view

“I saw a girl slip not once but twice right outside Forum. The sad part was that she slipped gracefully the first time and managed not to spill her coffee. But the second time she ate absolute shit. It was a hilariously sad thing to watch,” said junior Brad M. majoring in German, International Politics, and History.

“First night of freshman year, I was leaving South Halls with friends. We were totally sober, but my one friend thought he could do a running cartwheel in the courtyard right outside Simmons Hall,” said Brad. “He completely bombed it and ended up breaking his forearm with a clean snap. I spent the rest of the Saturday night in the hospital with him.”

State College will get you one way or another. Whether you take a hard hit on the ice in the brutal winter or take a tumble at a frat, it all happens to the best of us.

Stay safe out there, Penn State.