I realized I was wrong about being bi when I grew feelings for a girl

Freshman year of high school, I had a conversation with my friend about how bisexuality doesn’t make any sense. I remember saying something like, “If you like guys, great, if you like girls, awesome, but how can you like both? Can’t you just pick one?”

It’s been five years since then, and I’ve come to the conclusion that that was one of the dumbest things I’ve ever said in my life. I don’t want to say the dumbest, because I’ve said a lot of dumb shit and it’s hard to prioritize… but bisexuality is definitely a thing.

I’ve never thought much about my sexuality. I’ve had crushes on boys, though they never lasted very long, but I never saw any girl as anything more than a friend. It wasn’t something I considered.

But that changed when I met a girl, and suddenly all I wanted to do was spend time with her. I wanted to mean something to her, and despite my efforts, I couldn’t find one thing I disliked about her.

 I didn’t really know what I wanted from our relationship, but I knew it was more than friendship. And that person just happened to be a girl. I wanted to listen to all of her favorite songs, watch all of her favorite movies, and adopt every dog she made googly eyes at.

I spent half a semester trying to figure out how to make her love me, but unfortunately I was friend-zoned real quick. Still, with her, I was much more invested than I’d ever been with any guy in the past, and so I realized I was wrong about bisexuality.  

Cute pic of me not judging people

I didn’t come to this conclusion simply because I go to a liberal school that’s very accepting of LGBTQI students, but because I came to the realization that anyone can develop feelings for anyone. I experienced that first hand. It’s not about which bathroom they use, but about who they are, and how you feel when you’re with them.

Although I’m not a fan of labels myself, I’ve talked to many people who’ve said that a label really helps them. It can make you feel like you’re part of a community that accepts you for who you are, and shows that you’re far from alone in how you feel.

You don’t have to put a label on yourself and stick to it just because that’s what people expect from you. Sexuality is fluid. You’re allowed to change your mind, and you are definitely allowed to feel love for a person, whatever gender he, she or they might be.